How to Know You're in a Job Rut

I've only known one person in my entire life who jumped out of bed every morning anxious to get to work. Everyone else has been like me, a job is a chore and something you have to go. But sometimes you get in a rut and don't even realize it. Here's how to tell your in a job rut!

Difficulty: Easy

Instructions

1. 
    
   What illness can I pretend to have this week?

   EVERY single morning when you wake up you think about calling in sick.

2. 
    

   You arrive late a good portion of the time or even every day. When you are not late, you are precisely on time. You take every second of your allotted break and lunch time and you leave the very second you are allowed to.

3. You've made up relatives just to kill them off to get a day off for a non-existent funeral. (this is a really BIG sign that you might want to start looking for a new job!)

4. 
    
   I'm going to be late today... you wouldn't believe the traffic!

   You exaggerate the weather or traffic to go in late or stay home altogether.

5. 
    
   The Big Book of Excuses to Stay Home From Work

   You have actually bought a book with a title similar to "1,000 Excuses for Calling In Sick".

6. You plan your vacation time around days you already get off so you can maximize how many days you are off. You call in sick, or use and excuse from the Big Book of Excuses, on the day after the above mentioned extended vacation.

7. 
    
   I can honestly say I WENT to work. Noone said I had to stay!

   You've made it all the way to your job's parking lot and then turned around and went home and looked up an excuse in the above mentioned book!

8. You change your religion several times a year to get off additional Holiday Observances!

9. 
    
   Would you like fries with that?

   You think the guy at the Golden Arches drive up window has it easy and while eating your lunch practice saying "Would you like fries with that?".

Tips & Warnings

• If you've said "So, what's wrong with that?" to more then two of the above steps you might want to seriously think about looking for a new job.
• I wouldn't recommend beginning any of the above practices if you want to actualy keep your job!
• There's isn't really a Big Book of Excuses to Stay Home From Work. If there was, I'd buy one!
• This article was not meant to offend anyone, please don't take it seriously!

[joanhaines]

on 1/26/2009 I am so lucky, and I do know it! I have a profession I am passionate about, and I rarely wish to do anything else. Fun article. Thanks!

[veryirie]

on 1/23/2009 This is too funny!! I love step 3; I just never had enough guts to use fake deceased relatives as an excuse when I was in a job rut. Great read!

[Kallicat]

on 1/17/2009 Nice humorous article.

[Geargirl113]

on 1/15/2009 This is such a fun article. I have been in a job rut. It is very easy to find yourself there.

[HowDragon]

on 1/15/2009 LOL--Great ways to tell! 5*!