How to Enjoy Vacation with Your Adult Kids

Once your kids are teens to young adults, vacations get trickier. What's the best way to take a vacation with your kids (before they marry and have kids of their own), and enjoy it? Try some of these ideas.

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

Instructions

1. 

   Once your kids have jobs and live outside of your home, it's hard to get a date selected for your vacation. Offer a number of dates to the kids, and select the dates that work the best. Then, let the kids work on getting the time off that they need. If they can't get any time off, let them know that that's ok, and that they are welcome to join on the next trip.

2. 

   Be flexible. A rigid vacation schedule works for smaller kids, but not for older kids. Plan a couple of items that will take up much of the time, and the rest of the time is open. For example, we just took a ski trip for four days. We went skiing two of the days and relaxed the rest of the time (swimming, reading, movies). Whatever we decided to do, and not always doing things together. We also made sure everyone had adequate time to shower, do hair, get their things together, etc., without rushing them. Everyone was happier when they were NOT rushed.

3. Involve everyone in the planning, to some extent. What do the kids like to do that the parents like to do as well? Would they swim if the hotel has a pool, or not? Does everyone like to ski? To hike, etc. What games should you bring with for down-time? If everyone has a different idea, let them know that you have the final say and that they can choose to not go if they don't think it sounds like fun to them.

4. 

   Since the parents are inviting the kids, plan on paying for the hotel room, dinners and other major expenses. If the kids want $50 sweatshirt, that is a discretionary item and can be paid for by the child (or the parent, if you want to). It helps to book a hotel with a breakfast buffet included to cut down on the food expenses.

5. 

   If everyone is in the same room, bring ear plugs and cpap (breathing) machines to make sure that everyone can sleep in peace (and not be kept awake by snoring). Not sleeping well with cause crabbiness!

6. 

   Make sure and include down time. Kids like to check their email, etc. Maybe they want time each day to exercise, nap, play games, or read. Make sure that this time is available each day so everyone feels like they had a true vacation.

Tips & Warnings

• Parents are not responsible for an adult child's happiness. The vacation should be fun for everyone, and not a time for complaining about everything.
• The kids should bring money with them!
• Make sure to let them know what they need to bring with them (money, warm clothes, etc.) so they can pack accordingly.
• Enjoy your family! Once they have families of their own, family vacations are almost impossible to plan to include everyone's schedules.
• Not everything goes smoothly all of the time. Stay calm and handle problems right away and move on.
• If one of the kids doesn't want to join in the daily activity, leave them at the hotel if (they are adults). Don't let the one child ruin the day for everyone else.
• If the vacation is a total disaster, the next year, you and your spouse plan a trip alone!