How to Fall in Love With a Mate Again

Whether you have been married for 2 years or 10, the stress of kids, bills and a lack of communication can take its toll. The person you once dreamt about every second of the day becomes the last person on Earth you want to spend time with. The good news is that you can recoup the feelings for your mate that you thought were lost forever. As long as there is still a small spark left, the flame can be relit.

Instructions

1. 

   Talk to your mate. Communication is the key to any successful relationship. Although it may seem that everything else is more important, like little Johnny's soccer practice or Kimmy's ballet lesson, you need to find the time to talk to your partner. Once the kids have been tucked in for the night, express your feelings and listen while your mate expresses his. Once you know what each other's needs are, you can move on to the next step in the process.

2. 

   Look at early photographs. Take some time to look through old photo albums filled with pictures of the happier times in your relationship. Then reflect on those particular moments and remember what is was that made the two of you so happy at that particular moment. Conjuring up the good times can also conjure up the dynamic feelings you had for each other.

3. Recreate a moment. Maybe it was the first kiss at the drive-in, or maybe it was the night he proposed at your favorite restaurant.
   Whatever the moment was that cemented your desire to be with your mate for life, relive it. Allow yourself to be swept away into a place and time when it was all about the two of you, and soon it will be again.

4. 

   Make a date night. Set aside one night during the week when the kids are with grandma (or a friend you trust) and devote every minute of your alone time to each other. If finances are tight, stay at home and watch a movie. Better yet, stay at home and make mad, pasionate love. Often, a marriage begins to decline due to lack of intimacy. If, at least one night of the week, you rediscover that intimacy, you will soon find that you feel like a kid again, which will reignite those flames of passion.

5. 

   Give each other gifts. Men: Bring home some flowers, or even one, to show her you were thinking of her. Ladies: Make his favorite dessert or buy him a copy of his favorite sporting magazine. The gifts don't have to be expensive, but they do need to come from the heart. By demonstrating your love for each other, you are nurturing it, allowing it to grow and bloom into what it was before.

6. Say "I love you." Never, ever close your eyes at night without uttering these three simple yet meaningful words. While some people may say that they are only words, if they are coming from the heart, the conviction will be heard in the voice. Everyone needs an "I love you," especially a mate who was beginning to doubt its veracity.

Tips & Warnings

• If you have tried all of these methods and are still struggling, yet want to make your marriage work, you may need to pursue counseling.

Resources

• Nationwide directory of marriage counselors