How to Make Small Talk

Small talk is something we all have done. Small talk is basically having a conversation with someone about something that is not usually on a deep or philosophical level. Small talk conversations might include the weather, local news, or your hobbies. Some people do not enjoy small talk, but learning to be good at small talk can help you get a job, impress your boss, or make new friends. Learn a few tips about how you can improve your small talk skills.

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• Motivation to become better at small talk
• Willingness to challenge yourself
• Attend a party/social event

1. The first step in becoming better at small talk is to put yourself in more situations where small talk occurs. For example, small talk often can occur when you are at the grocery store or running other errands. While you are at the check out line encourage yourself to talk to your cashier. Ask him or her how they are doing. If you do not get much of a response, they probably are not in the mood to talk. If they do reply in a nice way, they are probably open to having a conversation with you.

2. Certain questions are great for small talk. It is important that you ask questions that are not "yes or no" questions. Asking "yes or no" questions makes it hard to keep a conversation alive.
   
   Example of a yes or no question- Are you excited the holidays are almost here?
   Example of a better question to ask- What are you going to be doing to celebrate the holidays?

3. Another good place to practice your small talk skills is at a party or other social event. If you tend to get nervous at parties then try to focus on what is going on around you. Listen to the music or check out what other people are doing. Look for someone who might be willing to start up a conversation. Go over to them and ask them some open ended questions. The following are good questions to ask.
   -How do you know the host/hostess?
   -What do you like to do in your spare time?
   -What do you do for a living?

4. Practice your small talk with friends of your friends. This will help you feel less intimidated because most likely your friends will be with you. If you need help keeping the conversation going, bring your friend into the conversation.

5. To become better at small talk, read books on the subject of small talk. I recommend the Fine Art of Small Talk by Debra Fine.

Tips & Warnings

• The best small talkers have worked for years to perfect their skills. Keep practicing and you too will improve your skills!
• If someone you try to talk to does not seem interested in talking with you, politely end the conversation and go talk to someone else. Do not feel bad, no person is going to be able to connect to every single person they talk to in their life.