How to Deal With A Critical Person

Learning how to handle critical people helps you maintain a positive attitude.

You meet different types of people every day, and no doubt some of these people are critical and negative. Some critical people are not aware of how they present themselves to others, while others do know but don't care. In many ways, critical people live to suck the energy out of those they encounter. Unfortunately, experiencing their criticism or negativity may impact your mood for the worse. That said, you can take steps to prevent a critical person's negativity from impacting your life.

Instructions

1. Learn to understand what the critical person is saying. This person may not realize that he or she is being tactless. When this individual speaks up and appears to be criticizing you or something you have done, he or she may simply be expressing a different opinion, albeit in a forceful manner.

2. Look at how this person expresses him or herself. If the person is always brusque or curt, he or she may not see how these behaviors come across to others. Rather than letting the tone of the message get you down, listen to what the person is saying instead.

3. Observe the person's relationships with other people you know in common, whether they be co-workers or friends. If this person is critical with others, then you should understand that this issue is not with you alone.

4. Accept this person's feedback as direct honesty. If, for instance, you are learning a new hobby and you think you are making progress, your critical friend may be doing you a favor when he or she tells you that you need to work harder. It may hurt at first, but as you learn to trust this feedback, you may start to make faster progress.

5. Maintain emotional and mental detachment from the critical person. Some critical or negative people draw energy from positive people. Rather than allowing your good mood and energy be impacted by this person's negativity, observe the person -- their words, tone of voice and body language. Smile and separate yourself from this individual as soon as you can.

6. Say to the negative person something like, "Tell me something happy. I want to hear something positive." Many critical people aren't aware of how they come across to others, and when you request a positive story, it gives them some insight about how negative they are. If the critical person is determined to remain in a negative frame of mind, he or she may decide it's not worth spending time with you because they would rather maintain a "victim" mentality.

7. Take the person's power away from them. This person wants to provoke a reaction, so he or she looks for what makes you react. Look at yourself and figure out why this person provokes you. Once you have figured this out, you can think of ways to keep from responding in the way he or she wants you to respond.

Tips & Warnings

• Critical people sometimes thrive on draining your good feelings and energy. Some of these people include archetypes like the fixer-upper, the blamer, the sob sister, the drama queen or the constant talker.

• You are bound to encounter a critical person, whether at work or in your personal life. When you do, you need to have strategies for dealing with him or her.

References

• The Personal Excellence Blog; 8 Helpful Ways to Deal With Critical People; Celes
• Life With Confidence; How to Deal With Negative People; Catherine Pratt