How to Adjust to First-Time Motherhood

After a 9-month wait, you're officially a mother. But after bringing home your new little one, you may realize that motherhood isn't what you expected. Becoming a parent can be an overwhelming, exhausting and yet exciting experience. Following these steps can help make the transition a little easier.

Difficulty: Moderately Challenging

Instructions

1. Enlist and accept the help of others, especially during the first few weeks. Ask friends or relatives to come stay with you for as long as they can, or just come over and help you out during the day. If possible, have your partner take some time off of work. When people do come over, let them help you with the baby or things that need to be done around the house.

2. Try not to let a messy house bother you. Caring for a child is exhausting, and it's more important for you to get your rest than for the dishes to be done. When you feel up to it, try tackling some projects. But for the first few months, don't overdo it.

3. Remember that feeling moody, overwhelmed and sad is normal during the first weeks postpartum. When these feelings come up, call a friend or loved one and talk through them. If you aren't feeling better after 2 weeks, or if you become concerned about your health or the health of your baby, contact your doctor. The "baby blues" and postpartum depression can be overcome.

4. If you become overwhelmed while caring for your baby--especially one who is crying or upset--briefly remove yourself from the situation. Put the baby in her crib and spend a few minutes alone to gather your thoughts and calm your nerves.

5. Get out of the house. Go walk around the mall, hang out with a friend or take a stroll around the block. If you don't feel up to actually going somewhere, just spend some time outside your home. The fresh air can help clear your mind and brighten your day.

6. Pamper yourself on a regular basis. When the baby is asleep, do something that makes you feel good. That could mean taking a long bath or a yoga class, or just reading a good book. After your body has had time to heal and your doctor says it's OK, begin an exercise program.

7. If you are married or have a significant other, make time for your relationship. Find a trusted babysitter and spend time alone as a couple. Whether or not you have a significant other, make time for old friends. Though you are now a mom, you are still a woman with an independent identity.

8. Find and join a community of new mothers. This could mean reconnecting with women who were in your prenatal class or joining a support group. Many hospitals and churches offer groups that provide new mothers with interaction and encouragement. Some websites, such as BabyCenter, offer virtual communities where moms can post questions and stories and discuss important topics. (See Resources.)

Tips & Warnings

• The first few months of motherhood are often the most difficult. New babies are very demanding, and caring for them is time-consuming. After a little while, your baby will become more able to interact and play, and she will sleep for longer periods of time. That newborn period doesn't last forever! Remember that there is no such thing as a perfect mom. It's a new experience, and everyone makes mistakes. Just learn from them and enjoy the time you have with your little one!
• If you ever become concerned for your own health or the health of your baby, contact your doctor.

Resources

• BabyCenter