How to Find a Roommate You'll Get Along With

Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

Information
Common Sense
Good Communication Skills

Step 1

Before posting a want ad for a roommate you need to take some time to reflect on the kind of roommate you want. We don't always get what we want but if you have an idea, this will go a long way. Never just post for a roommate and hope for the best. Take the time to plan. If you are already living with someone else (a significant other for example), then this is a decision that will affect both of you. Sit down and discuss your options.
Step 2

Decide where you will post an ad for a roommate. In the age of the Internet, many people turn to sites such as Craig's List, while others stick to the traditional methods like the newspaper. However, online sites usually will get you quicker responses, which can be helpful if you need a roomie in a hurry.
Step 3

Write your ad carefully. Be sure to clearly state what you are looking for and what you are offering. If you are posting online, read all of the rules and regulations. Sites like Craig's List are very strict about writing ads that do not discriminate against others because of race, gender, sexual orientation, or religion. Words are powerful so be careful of how you word things. Write a rough draft first and have someone else read it and give you feedback. Does it make sense? Are there any areas that could use a bit more detail or clarification? When you're happy with your content, then post your ad.
Step 4

Be wary about giving too much information about yourself or where you live. Instead of giving the exact address in your post, name the area or use familiar street names so that the person can find it on Google or Yahoo Maps. You don't want to advertise where you live to a bunch of strangers online. When you start receiving offers to meet with the people in person, arrange the meeting at a public place (cafe, restaurant, etc) first before bringing them to your place of residence. If you don't have a good feeling about the person, chances are you won't want them knowing where you live.
Step 5

Example of CL roommate ad.

In your post, be sure to mention the following information: area you live in, how much you are charging, amenities (if any), number of rooms and bathrooms (will they have their own room and bathroom or will be they sharing any of the spaces with others?), and any perks (do you live close to major freeways for commuting, shopping centers, etc?). You can also choose to include a photo of the interior of the room you are offering up for rent. When it comes to payment arrangements, you can briefly mention this in your post or simply state that more info regarding payment will be provided to those you meet with.
Step 6

In order to get a roommate that you will get along with, be sure to also include in your post a bit about you as well as the other person or people you live with. Without being discriminatory, state the ideal traits you want a roommate to have. For example, mention the type of person you are. Are you a quiet person, party goer, workaholic, student, person who works from home, corporate employee, etc? Stating your personality and basic lifestyle information will help weed out the people that may not get along with you lifestyle or personality wise. If you work hard all day or work a night shift, you won't want a roommate who likes to party and invite people over all the time. Are you a neat freak? Then ask for a roommate who is cleanly. Worried about your roommate paying rent on time? Then state that your ideal roommate should be financially responsible. If you don't dabble in let's say "leisurely activities," then be sure to state that you would prefer a roommate that does not smoke, drink, and is drug free (a commonly used phrase is "not 420 friendly"). Also mention if you care about a roommate that smokes cigarettes. All these details can keep you from wasting your time interviewing people you know won't get along with you. You want to find someone who ideally has similar interests or a similar lifestyle.
Step 7

Once you've chosen your roommate, communication is key. Don't expect them to be able to read your mind. If you have certain rules, then say so. Take some time to list any rules or regs you may have. Don't be afraid to speak up if your new roomie does something that bothers you or breaks the rules. When developing house rules, be sure to take into account all parties involved...it shouldn't just be about you and what suits you. Ask them how they feel about the house rules and if any of them should be changed or modified. Remember, there are ways of saying certain things without coming across negatively. Instead of reading your roommate the riot act when they do something wrong, simply mention the incident and remind them of what you discussed and then keep it moving.
Step 8

Don't be shy about asking for the rent check from them. It is up to you to remain a bit of an authority when it comes to financial matters. But that doesn't mean you need to harp on them. Be cool about it. I like to joke around a lot so when rent comes around, I'll tell my roommate, "Hey, man, it's that time of the month and I need a bit of your soul again."
Step 9

If your roommate does something that bugs you, tell them in a polite way. If they repeat the action, don't be quick to confront them...things happen and maybe they didn't mean to do it (leave dirty dishes, scattered paperwork--whatever it is)...see if they correct it on their own. If they don't, or it happens more than once or twice, then talk to them about it. It's all about communication. Don't sit by and say nothing and expect them to know what's up. Most people just need a simple reminder to keep them on top of things.
Step 10

A common area where roommates disagree is when it comes to the kitchen and food. This is where having house rules helps. For example, my boyfriend and I came up with rules for the kitchen that we showed to our roommate and all agreed upon. Our kitchen rules are as follows:

1) Don't let dishes pile up in the sink. Wash them after you're done, and if dishes do start to pile up, just wash them. (The 3 of us aren't that bothered by washing other people's dishes as long as it isn't a crazy amount...we also know to say "thank you" when we notice that someone else is washing a dish or dishes that we used).

2) Soak dishes and cups in water to soften food.

3) Do not wash plastic utensils...throw them away (I came up with this one because, hey, I live with two guys!).

4) If you don't know whose food or drink it is, ask before consuming. (Sometimes we buy a lot of the same foods and tend to forget)

5) If you finish a food item or drink that you didn't originally buy, purchase a new one for the original buyer.

Your rules should accommodate the daily habits of you and your roommates. We tailored our kitchen rules based on observations I made about myself, my boyfriend and our roommate. If your roommate doesn't do any of these things, then you won't need to include it in the rules. Address the concerns that you want to correct.
Step 11

Above all else, keep up the lines of communication open and have the discipline and common sense to listen as well as talk. Hear what your roommate has to say because even though you're the one offering them a place to stay, they are paying their hard earned money so that also gives them leverage in terms of what goes on in your household. Maintain a good balance and it should be all good.

Comments

texasparky said

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on 3/6/2009 Outstanding article! Very well written, thorough and detailed. If someone still screws up after reading this, it's no fault of the author!