Things You'll Need:
- A dose of good cheer
- A positive spirit
- A willingness to change
- Some good friends
- Egg Nog (or some other holiday treat)
- Holiday Music
- slippered jammies
- Hot cocoa
- Snow (optional)
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Step 1
The first step is to take a deep breath, close your eyes and empty your head of all the things that are presently bothering you. This step requires a clear mind before we can go further, so clear your mind. Think about the ocean, concentrate on the sound of your breath or your heart beat, think about the sound of one hand clapping. Just calm yourself. You know the way. Once you have slowed down a bit proceed to the next step.
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Step 2
Get a blank piece of paper and a pen and find a quiet spot to sit and write.
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Step 3
REMEMBER! This might be hard for some of you old scrooges out there. But it's possible. Let's go back to a time when things were simpler. A time when maybe you weren't so concerned about getting everyone the right gift, or making the good appearance or being a good parent or employee. Let's focus on the years that have gone by.
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Step 4
WRITE! Now you've probably had some time to focus on those memories of the past. Some were very good and everyone has few bummer Christmases, and I'm not talking about getting horrible gifts (which we all have had, let's face it). Let's think about the good memories. Perhaps you went sleigh riding down the hill outside your grammar school, or burned your tongue on hot cocoa. Or maybe there was a poor Christmas when your family couldn't afford a tree so your little brother went across the street and cut down your neighbor's bush (okay so I'm joking a little). Let's get down on paper those things about the holiday that make it so special. And please, get beyond the material possessions that you want, or think will make you happiest. The truth abut things is that they are just things. They get old. They die. They don't feed our souls especially electronics which are ever moving forward and last year's model is last year's model. The same goes for clothing, music, etcetera. Let's focus on the non-material goods - like laughter. This is something you might get after having a snowball fight. And who doesn't remember that good old cup of hot cocoa which seems to be the best and the hottest ever after a snowstorm. And how about the zaniness of the holiday? Maybe you've forgotten how good it was to get out of school for that holiday break! WE need to re-kindle those feelings or warmth and kindness and shear happiness to be alive. Even those of us who've had the most dire of circumstances, do have at least one holiday moment. Let's find that moment or those moments that can never be taken away from us because they are intangible and magical. These are the moments and the things I want you to write down on your list.
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Step 5
You've written your list. You know what makes you happiest in the holiday season or what did. Now let's conquer the list. Take another sheet of paper and make three categories. One we'll call activities, one we'll call food, and one we'll call material goods.
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Step 6
In the first category, write down the activities which make you happy. It's a bad economy, but one thing that psychologists will agree on is that if you enjoy shopping, you will also enjoy window shopping. As it turns out, the joy you get from buying or impulse buying - those good feels which are a chemical reaction in the brain, still come even if you don't purchase a thing! The mere act of window shopping (that is, without buying just looking) has the same effect. And the benefit is that you can go into the most expensive stores. Try on items, look around. Just be certain to leave your credit cards at home!
If it's sleigh-riding you fancy, find a hill, and prepare. If it's in your yard you might pour water down the hill to make sure there's ice on that particularly snowy day. Or find a place that rents toboggans. If it's ice skating find a rink that's cheap. Rent or buy some skates at a thrift store. Find an indoor rink or if your in NYC go to Bryant Park where it's free.
Snowmen may require snow in most parts, but if you like it, write it down. And plan for it. Find a place and a way. Believe me when I tell you that half the fun is in the planning!
Continue with the next category and write down your favorite foods. Then buy what you can, or are allowed to have, or find a suitable replacement. If you liked those angel shaped napoleons from the local bakery, buy one. If you can't afford one, ask the baker for a sample or buy one day old and warm it in the microwave for a few seconds. Be resourceful! And don't be afraid to bake cookies the old fashioned way if you know how, or if you don't ask one of the older people you know if they, could be fun to try. You may get burnt holiday cookies but imagine the fun and joy you'll have. If you have kids, pull them away from the television and the games and get them involved, and if they don't throw a little flour at them and give a hearty ho ho ho! That'll get them going! Enjoy and live and love.
Now in that material goods column, write down the things you loved as a kid, like sleigh riding or the smell of Grandpa's pipes, or the board games you played, and if you aren't old enough to have had board games, go the store or the salvation army and you'll find many for pennies on the dollar. Think simple, fun and cheap. Make the list and fill it. -
Step 7
Make your list of people you want to send holiday cards to! Go through your appointment books and address books. If you keep old cards, bring them out and start writing down addresses. Get yourself a nice long healthy list! Once you've compiled your list, then go out and buy a few hundred cards! Do it! Or make them yourself on your computer! Be creative and don't be afraid to be down right silly. So they may think you've lost a few marbles along the year! Hey, everyone can use a good chuckle these days, and laughter is a beautiful gift to give! So don't be afraid to be silly..and get those cards.
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Step 8
Once you have the cards, the next job will take a little time. Address the cards and then, and this won't kill you...take the time to write a personal note to your friends and family and whomever you write. Remember, you may not be here next year to write a card. Any one of us could be celebrating for the last time, or maybe the receiver won't be around. So this is the time to say something nice and personal. I'm not talking about telling them the story of your life and how you would be nothing without their meatloaf! c'mon. But what does it hurt to remind them of the time you both cut chapel and ran down to the local bakery for double chocolate chip pecan pie? Dig into the past if you must, but remember something happy and wonderful that you shared and write a little note that only the two or three of you share. It may be hard and take some time, but you can do it. Think of something happy and wonderful and if you can't do this, then just wish the person well. Don't say, "I wish you have a better personality in the new year, or I wish you weren't so fat, or annoying"... or any other back-handed insults...be sincere and loving and find a little happiness that you can share. It helps if you laugh a little while your thinking of whatever it is you're thinking of. Take your time. Be sincere. Write from your heart. And when you wish them well, really wish them well. Then stamp them all, seal the envelopes and stick them in the mail.
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Step 9
Holiday drinkie time! After you've written these cards and mailed them, give yourself a hug and get a holiday drink. I personally enjoy hot cocoa and egg nog. But for some of you it might be a fruit drink or an energy drink. Just have something special that you don't normally do. Make this an exception to the rule and say, as you drink it, "Happy Holidays to me!" And toast yourself. That done, move on to the next step.
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Step 10
DECORATE! If you have old holiday decorations, take them down and do it! Who cares if you're the only one living in your house! Do it! The act of decorating will shoot your adrenaline and feelings of good spirits up through your body. Put on some holiday music and dance around the house in your slippered jammies and just let loose. Hot cocoa and cookies later! Do it! Decorate! And if you don't have decorations, make them out of newsprint or soup cans or coloring books or whatever you have around the house. You decide to be happy and just do it and don't let anyone stop you. This is the one time of year when you can be as silly as you like and just chalk it up to good holiday feelings! Chances are the people around you calling you nuts will be singing and dancing and decorating with you to. And they may be grim in front of you, but you can be sure they're cracking a half smile on their way out! It's a good time to celebrate. Sure, we'll always have troubles, but set them aside and do it! Smile and decorate.
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Step 11
Gloomy Gus. This is a hard step. But we all have them in our lives. You are happy and dancing and writing cards and singing silly songs and drinking egg nog or cocoa or what have you and there in the corner sits "gloomy gus." Yes, we all have them in our lives. They are never happy. The economy is blah blah blah or we don't have a job, blah blah blah, well, the economy is so bad it's almost laughable. Give them a Christmas candy and tell them that we can only go up from here and so we might as well have holiday cheer! And sing some holiday songs about snowmen or whatever and tell them, hey, ya still gotta pulse and things can change and we must embrace those few moments of happiness and joy we share and sing a Grinch stole Christmas song or something from Charlie brown or whatever little silly nursery rhyme goes into your head and if the still don't laugh or smile, then take your Santa sack full of joy and good feelings and skip on down to your next task spreading merriment and good cheer all along the way as you go. Feeling bad about life, the world and what's missing will not accomplish one darn thing. We need to see what it is that we do have, that feeling of holiday and good spirit that unites us from all faiths and backgrounds. It's this time of year when we can be glad just to be alive. We don't do much worrying or complaining when we're in the ground. Life is short. Embrace these moments when you can hug other people you love without having a reason. Just blame the season. Remember, you can't always change the moods of others or how they act toward you, you can only control how you react. Grasp that plastic you carry in your pocket for just such an emergency to give your strength, or Rudolph or one of the other rein deer and give them one of the holiday sugar cookies you carry in your pockets and then skip on down the road singing merrily as you go. Don't let anyone steal your sunshine!
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Step 12
Holiday Shopping. This is a tough one, it being a cheap and perfect holiday. We are always so apt to overdo, piling present after present for those we love. We try to make them happy, but how often do we fail. We got the wrong size, or maybe it wasn't the right gift, or maybe we forgot to buy the batteries or went to the wrong store, or bought the wrong color or it was just wrong, the entire gift. We insulted when we hoped to encourage and we were hurt when they didn't like our gifts. The worst part is the credit cards bills that follow or the rent or car payment that never got paid! And all this for a heart-felt and crushing disappointment. Listen, the secret to a good gift is not the quantity or even the price. A smart gift giver knows how to give something which will mean all the world to someone else. The secret is, be thoughtful. Think hard and long about the person you are giving the gift to. What does he/she like. What makes them happiest? What is their secret joy? Do they collect things? Sometimes the best gift is the simplest gift. If you are buying something for your spouse, go back in your memory to those first dates. Perhaps you went to a drive in and you spilled your soda on her lola falanna blouse..why not take a drive back to that drive in and pick some tickets for the hoiday - you might even pick up a lola falanna blouse at the thrift store! Or perhaps you met in a karaoke bar...why not go back there. Try to remember a time when things were simpler and you had less and laughed more! An ice-skating party could be a wonderful thing, and if you're too old and fat to skate you can always go and have cocoa and watch the skaters. The important thing is thoughtfulness, getting back to those things that were once the world to you and when just being together was enough. It was, and it can be again, because this holiday spirit begins with you. And if at the end of this handy dandy list you still find you must buy something of value, make it one gift instead of a pile, and make it significant. It's better to receive one thoughtful gift then a pile of gifts that will end up un-used or returned.
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Step 13
Plan holiday parties. Go to every holiday party. Attend school choir recitals, ballet recitals, holiday plays. Go see the band at the local high school play. Sing and carol! Ice skate. Dance around the shopping mall! Hug your kids and your wife and those you love and your grumpy neighbor. Do a favor for someone. Wrap gifts for charity! Do it! Make cocoa and give some to the people on the corner who collect for the poor. Do it! Give and give and give and laugh and laugh and laugh and hug and sing and dance and be silly! Do it! This is the time. Forget your troubles. They aren't going anywhere. And if you don't have any troubles, then check your pulse because having problems and challenges and worries is part of being alive. If you haven't got any, you aren't breathing. It's such a gift to live in this world and to have life now in these very exciting times of change! We must embrace that which is good and love every minute because too soon, far too soon for many of us, our time comes to an end. Tell me, how do you want to be remembered? You may say that you do not care, but listen, you do. We remain alive in the memories of others. Let's make this season our chance to be and do and live out the extraordinary. Let us be exceptional human beings, not only to one another but to ourselves. You owe it to yourselves to forgive and to love and to let go of those things that you've been holding on to for far too long. And love. Love yourself and those around you this holiday season. That is truly the ticket to a perfect and cheap holiday season. Do these few things and you will find that the holiday spirit will well up in you so strong that no one and nothing, be it finances, or grumpy people or slush in your boots on a drizzly day, can bring you down, because this is life and you are alive and living and able to share laughter and love and happiness, if only for a few short moments in this life with others, the greatest gifts you can bring. They last forever and they do not rot, or tarnish or fade away with time. They never go out of style and they are always in the right size. Be of good cheer, the holiday is here! Let this holiday be the one everyone remembers as their favorite year. You may hear them tell of it somewhere ages and ages ahead, that, "we were at the worst possible time of our lives, everything was going wrong, and we had the best holiday ever. Funny when you have nothing how you can have everything at the same time!"
