How to Handle an Annoying Co-worker

Dealing with annoying coworkers requires tact and patience.

Co-workers talking too loud, conversations about overly personal topics, annoying cell phone ring tones and people who use their speakerphones at work make the top list of annoying actions by co-workers surveyed by Harris Interactive and Randstad in 2006. A proactive approach to dealing with an annoying co-worker can provide relief, allowing you to focus on your job, and not on the co-worker's behavior.

Instructions

1. Evaluate the specific problem with the co-worker to determine the nature of the problem. Troublesome issues involve talking too much, speaking too loudly, borrowing your work equipment or using technology in an annoying manner, including playing music too loudly in an office environment. Evaluate your own concerns to ensure your annoyance isn't a curmudgeonly attitude on your part, and determine that the coworker truly annoys. Survey friends and family members about their reaction to your description of the coworker's actions to collect input to decide if the annoying behavior rises to a level requiring action.

2. Brainstorm the cause of the annoying behavior. Note your behavior before the annoying actions to evaluate your role, if any, in provoking it. Robert Bacal, organization and staff development consultant and CEO of Bacal and Associates, a management and training organization, notes annoying and difficult people use actions to respond to situations out of their control, and also to draw attention to themselves. If you provide the motivation for the annoying actions, change your behavior.

3. Practice behavior modification techniques involving feedback when dealing with the co-worker. Nancy Aldrich, superintendent of human resources at the Arlington Heights Illinois Park District, recommends approaching the annoying co-worker directly, but in a non-confrontational way. Avoid putting blame on the person for the problem, but explain using "I and you" statements how the behavior impacts you. If loud music interferes with your work production, state, "I have trouble focusing on my work because I'm distracted by the loud music." The annoying co-worker understands the problem and the solution through one simple statement when presented in a clear, non-confrontational manner. Avoid emotionally charged language or anger.

4. Brainstorm ways to physically avoid the co-worker, if the direct approach fails to work. Arrange for alternative lunch hours and take your breaks when you observe the co-worker still involved with work. If possible, arrange your work hours around the annoying person's schedule, even if this means working earlier in the morning or staying later in the day. While this appears to disrupt your work life, the alternative means interacting with the co-worker as a regular part of your day.

5. Approach your supervisor about the problem, if your actions fail to motivate your co-worker to change the annoying behavior and efforts to physically avoid the person prove unsuccessful. When the person's behavior involves physical threats or harassment, document the behavior by using a secret video or audio recorder and notify your supervisor immediately about your concerns. Be prepared for moderating actions that involve moving you from your workstation until the problem is resolved.

References

• Amtec Resources; Taming the Difficult Employee; Nancy Aldrich; April 2010
• Bacal & Associates: About Robert Bacal - The Biography
• "Manager's Guide to Performance Reviews"; Robert Bacal; 2004
• "USA Today"; Don't Let Annoying Co-Workers Drive You Bananas; Mary Clare Jalonick; December 2002
• "Forbes"; I Really Think Your Ringtone is Clever...No, Really; Tara Weiss; July 24, 2007
• ABC: Good Morning America; Co-Worker Driving You Crazy? Here's What to Do; Charlie Herman; March 21, 2006