Things You'll Need:
- Lust
- Gluttony
- Greed
- Sloth
- Wrath
- Envy
- Pride
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Step 1
Christmas LovingLUST. Christmas designed lingerie, checking out Santa's Elves at the mall, and obsessing over what your beloved will "give" you in return for your gift are all part of this. But the main example I turn the light to is the "stolen kiss". The one time of year you can get away with kissing anyone of your choosing, and all you need is to lure them beneath some mistletoe and have away. Fun fact: According to old Christian traditions, mistletoe was once a tree from which the "True Cross" was furnished.
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Step 2
Nom Nom NomGLUTTONY. The obviously overweight Santa Claus, packing away millions of cookies left out by children in one night, sets the tone for the second deadly sin. There are the chocolate calendars, pasties and pies galore, and gallons of eggnog to be slurped down. Christmas dinner with ham, fruit-cakes, pies, Yule logs, and casseroles always packs on a few pounds. What I'll focus on is the food thrown around for mere decoration. Millions of candy canes hung on tree limbs is bad, but all the wasted grub that goes into making gingerbread houses are worse. But recreating the witch' s home from a fairy tale shouldn't be considered wasting food, should it?
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Step 3
The list goes on and onGREED. I'll actually revert back to the children for this one. As you go on your annual shopping venture, stroll through the toy departments and listen to the collective message emanating from all around you. To some it up in two words: "I want". You'll witness greedy little hands clasping onto everything that catches their attention and pleading cries to the parental figure three steps behind. Most of the time, they receive a response to the tune of, "Well then, ask Santa" instead of the more appropriate lecture on needs versus wants, along with a request for insight on the already astounding piles of unused toys cluttering their room. Sadly, the greed is answered with compliance, resulting in someone paying $1500 for a tickle-me Elmo in 1996.
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Step 4
Awwww...SLOTH. The very meaning of sloth has changed over the years. Present day, it is defined as laziness or indifference. With all the tasks of shopping, wrapping, hosting, and decorating, I can't say a thing to this extent. Everyone is busy this time of year. However originally, sloth was defined by sadness and despair when it was originally included amongst the 7 deadly sine. That is easily tackled by the astounding rates of depression over the holidays. True while Christmas may bring joy to some, it also is a time of isolation teeming with negative thoughts in others. But be happy, I am including a picture of baby sloths to cheer them up. Yay!
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Step 5
What did you bring me?WRATH. We'll just glance at the raging shopping stampedes which have, at times, been fatal to people trampled upon, and move on. We'll skip over the in-store assaults and beatings that have been attributed to short supply of must-have holiday gifts. We'll even ignore the head lock you want to put your aunt in after she spills red wine on your new carpet during Christmas dinner, as well as the sometimes violent snowball fights of children. True wrath is anger, and if the holiday traffic, long lines at the stores, blinking Christmas lights keeping you awake, unraveling the knots that are your Christmas lights, or the pleading eyes of the salvation army don't tick you off a bit... I'm sure there is something else I forgot to mention.
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Step 6
Where's mine?ENVY. Obviously, you find people that didn't receive the gifts they had most counted on being a little jealous of their neighbors. If you have more than one child of the same sex, it's easily read it in their faces as they open their gifts. But the one that goes overlooked most often is the check-out line at Wal-mart. You will usually spy someone in front of, behind, or in another aisle buying something you wish you could afford. "It must be nice" is a line I hear a lot during this time of year... and the sweet ring of envy in every syllable.
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Step 7
Who's the champ?!?!PRIDE. What? You got what you wanted? Show it off and let the whole world know how lucky you are! But there is another form of pride in this time of giving, and it's surprisingly more malicious. Everyone gives presents, but it's the pride in the giving that gets out of hand. To some the main objective is this: To give a gift they will like the most of all. Giving becomes something personal, a competition between you and the other gift givers, to win thanks or praise or the title of "the coolest ______ ever!!!" And some people take very much pride in that.
