Forgiving Yourself
Forgiving yourself for past errors, mistakes and misdeeds can be difficult. It is not overwhelmingly tough, and it is necessary in order to curb regret and future sadness. By forgiving yourself, you are taking proactive measures to enhance your own happiness. Careful management of your emotional health is critical to success. Follow the steps below to forgive yourself.
Other People Are Reading
Instructions
-
-
1
Take time the think about what you have done. How serious was your infraction? Think about how it affected you and continues to affect you. Think about how it may have affected others. Ask someone you trust to work through this with you. If you are religious, seek advice from your religious leaders. Or, ask a good friend to discuss these problems with you. After you've truly recognized the error, judged its consequence on your and others lives and thought about repairing the problem you can steps to move forward.
-
2
Start by apologizing to others. If this is a strictly personal situation, skip this step. Take time to seek out those who may have been hurt or wronged by your error, and make time to sit down with them. Avoid the phone for these discussions. When face to face, make sure to allow the other person time to vent their frustration. It's important to listen to their grievances. After they've finished, keep your portion short and concise, but make sure it is sincere. A simple 'I'm sorry" and a brief explanation of your actions and your future intentions usually works best.
-
-
3
Start a self-reflective process. A good way to do this is to start or continue writing in a journal. Make time to write a little each day. When writing, try to develop in words how you feel, how you'd like to feel and what you'd like to do differently. Often it helps to actually write down your thoughts, and then read them back to yourself. Be honest with your goals for change. Manage your schedule and take time each day to reflect on your past error.
-
4
Reconcile with yourself. After you've worked through your issues with your religious leader, your friends, and those who you have wronged, it's time to forgive yourself. Acknowledge the fact that you've taken all these steps to repair your friendships. Acknowledge that you've reflected on your own problems in writing. Refer yourself back to the progress you've made in your journal. Commit to yourself that you will not make the same mistakes in the future, and set up guidelines by which you will control your behavior. After this, it's time to put this memory away. It's important to keep it stored, but it must leave your daily thoughts--it's time to move on.
-
1
