How to Be a Good Neighbor in a Suburban Area

Living in a suburban area can be a wonderful thing--and a great place to raise a family and live in peace and contentment--that is, if you get along well with your neighbors. Living in close proximity to other families and houses requires everyone adopt a certain unspoken etiquette to keep harmony in the neighborhood. Adopt these tips and you'll become everyone's favorite neighbor!

Instructions

1. Respect your neighbor's space. Boundary lines may be marked by fences, trees, shrubs or other physical guides, but in many cases they are not. Regardless, you should know where your lot ends and your neighbor's begins--and then respect his space. Don't walk across your neighbor's lawn to save a few steps. Don't let your children's toys extend into your neighbor's lot. Don't allow your children to play in the neighbor's yard without permission. If the apples from your tree fall onto your neighbor's yard, offer to clean them up. Recognize that your neighbor's yard is his private space.

2. Keep pets in your own yard. While you may love your pets, your neighbors may not. And even if they do like your animals, they will not appreciate the little surprise packages visiting pets bring with them--from chewed up balls and other toys to dog bones and especially piles of doggy doo. Monitor your pets at all times or keep them on a leash and keep them out of your neighbors' yards. If necessary, install an "invisible fence" to keep your pets on your property.

3. Maintain your privacy. Use curtains and shades on your windows. Your neighbors don't want to see everything that is going on in your home when the lights are on at night, and they probably don't relish you watching them from your couch in the evening when they are outside having a barbecue either. Likewise, don't pop over to visit and chat every time your neighbors step outside. While a friendly "hello" is one thing, unwanted guests are another thing altogether. Your neighbors probably want to enjoy some quiet time alone in their own yards just as you do.

4. Control the noise level. Shouting adults, screaming children, barking dogs and blaring stereos can turn a peaceful neighborhood into a nightmare--and no one wants to live next door to the noisy neighbors. So do your best to control the noise level in your home and yard--and particularly at commonly respected "quiet hours" such as between the hours of 8:00 p.m. and 8:00 a.m.

5. Keep your yard neat and clean. Mow your yard regularly. Don't allow "junk" or clutter to pile up in your yard. Dispose of garbage properly. Clean up after pets and make your children put their toys away regularly. One bad apple spoils the bunch, so the saying goes, and the same goes for a neighborhood. One house that suffers from neglect or a yard that becomes overgrown reflects negatively on the entire neighborhood, brings property values down and irritates everyone in the neighborhood!

6. Mind your own business--unless you have reason to suspect abuse or illegal activity. If your neighbor's get new furniture delivered, you don't need to inquire or comment on it. If they have a house guest, there's no need to give them the inquisition. And if the neighbors have a disagreement, you don't need to know what it's about. Unless you suspect there is something unlawful or potentially harmful happening in your neighbor's house, minding your own business will endear you to all your neighbors!

7. Be friendly. When you see your neighbors outside or elsewhere, smile and wave. It's a simple gesture, but it goes a long way. A simple "Hello" or "Nice weather we're having, isn't it?" can invite additional conversation if your neighbors are receptive and may turn into a friendship. Even if your neighbors prefer to keep to themselves, general friendliness promotes harmony in the neighborhood and makes it a pleasant place to live.

8. If you borrow it, return it--promptly. The neighbor who borrows things and loses, misplaces or breaks them quickly becomes an enemy. As a rule, it's probably not a good idea to borrow lots of things back and forth--especially things that can be easily damaged or broken or are expensive to repair or replace. But if you do have a good relationship with your neighbor and you borrow or lend things from time to time, make sure you return anything you use promptly when you are through using it and in the same condition as when you got it in the first place.

9. Keep the lines of communication open. If you do encounter a problem with your neighbor, try to communicate the concern or the issue with your neighbor directly. Go to your neighbor and talk it out in a non-confrontational way. Try to resolve it. Compromise if you can. Don't gossip about the problem with your other neighbors first or call the police department to lodge a complaint on a more serious issue until you have at least made a good faith effort to resolve the issue with the neighbor first.

Tips & Warnings

• Everyone responds well to a neighbor who follows the golden rule.

• If you're new to the neighborhood, don't expect to be accepted automatically. Some folks are more friendly and welcoming than others. Some neighborhoods are rather "cliquey" and will take longer to warm up to newcomers.