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Step 1
Get involved. Men need to hang around men who want the same things they do. They need mentors who understand how to balance the responsibilities of a career with the responsibilities of being a husband, a father, and a friend. Help a young groom become a good husband by devoting a few hours a week guiding and nurturing him.
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Step 2
Set an example. Men need mentors who’ve "been there and done that." They need mentors who can show them, by example, how to make their wives happy, how to succeed at work and how to be an influential parent. You can do that by inviting your mentee to a few family and corporate functions. Allow them to see you in action.
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Step 3
Be a good listener. Men are known for keeping everything they feel locked up inside themselves. They don’t like to appear weak so it’s your job to get them to trust you enough to open up to you. One way you can do that is by being an active listener. Let your mentee know that you care enough to give them your undivided attention. Ask questions when you need clarification and allow it to be a discussion, not a lecture.
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Step 4
Be honest. Your mentee is already getting plenty of advice from many people. Your job as a mentor is to be truthful—even when it does not feel good doing so. If your mentee is wrong for lashing out at his wife, don’t let him get away with it. Tell him why you believe he is wrong, ask him why he did it and ask him how he’d like to rectify the situation. If he isn't sure how to apologize, role play with him.
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Step 5
Be specific. New husbands are often given sugar-coated information when it comes to how hard marriage really is or they’re given trash talk about how awful marriage will become after the honeymoon is over. Both approaches give young grooms the wrong impression about marriage. Talk to your mentee about what it means to be married to someone who lives with you 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Talk to him about what it means to help around the house, instead of leaving all the housework to his wife. Discuss with him how to nurture his wife's needs for conversation without feeling burdened by the process.Teach him how to talk about sex with his wife and how it vastly differs from the way men talk to each other about sex. Explain to him what makes a good role model for children and how he can be that role model.
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Step 6
Offer accountability. In order for men to change, they need to know that someone can provide moral support to them. They need to know that there is someone there they can trust. Be a mentor who has integrity.
