How to Survive Marriage

Member

By Jen Errair
User-Submitted Article

Article Rating:

(12 Ratings)

Happily Ever After?

Most of us have heard that marriage is work. But we don't always understand how much work until AFTER we've said "I Do". In days when the divorce rate is over fifty percent (50%) how can we guarantee "forever"? The following article will provide tips on how to survive marriage after the honeymoon.

Difficulty: Moderately Challenging

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

A desire to stay married.

Step 1

Choose Your Battles

Pick your battles carefully. Prioritize what things irk you the most about your spouse. But do not concentrate too much on the little things because it will turn everything into a battle. Your partner then figures that they can't seem to do ANYTHING right, so why even try? It ends up frustrating for both parties. You can still win the war, without winning every battle that comes your way!
Step 2

Arguments Happen

Arguments are bound to happen the longer you are together. Never argue in front of children or friends. If you must, relocate yourselves away from others and discuss any issues privately. When you argue, do NOT go to your parents for solace. The best advice I received was from my mother who said, "Never come to me when you fight with your spouse, I will always side with you and hold it against him even LONG after you've made up". Leave family members out of it!
Step 3

Date Night

Plan a date night. If you have children, schedule a babysitter in advance for those dates so you can keep a consistent schedule. If you do not have children, you should still have date nights! Although you can schedule in-home "date nights", they should be used sparingly. Changes in scenery are great for keeping spontaneity in your relationship. Additionally, date nights do not need to be expensive. Pack a picnic and stroll to a local park to enjoy it, or drive the car to a secluded spot and stargaze together.
Step 4

Have Separate Interests

Have separate interests and friends! Sure, your spouse can be your best friend, but you should both have outside interests that you can pursue on your own. It's always good to have your own sets of friends, too - they do not have to all be "couple" friends. This way, if you have to vent about your spouse (which DOES happen), you have someone to vent to and so does he!
Step 5

Appreciate Each Other

Never take your partner for granted. Always appreciate them even with the smallest thing, but do not do it so often that it is perceived as insincere. Face it, we all like it when people notice - even if it's just the carpet getting vacuumed! So, show appreciation when warranted.
Step 6

Show You Care

Showing that you care does not have to be expensive nor should it be reserved only on designated holidays! If you see a daisy on the way home, take it to your wife, or have your spouses' favorite meal ready when they walk in the door from a tough day! Just tell them that you appreciate them - it can be as simple as that!