Things You'll Need:
- Pen or Pencil
- Writing Pad
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Step 1
Acknowledgement. Too many times, people say they have forgiven, but their actions/gestures reveal differently. Be honest with yourself so you can be truthful with everyone else. Write down what offended you.
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Step 2
Willingness, the most crucial step. Having a willing heart can take a moment, week, month, or years. The journey is up to you. If you are not willing to forgive the person, you will not forgive yourself.
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Step 3
Get the lesson(s). With every incident that births an opportunity to forgive, there are lessons to be learned. This is one of the reasons it is so important to forgive. Wisdom and knowledge comes from experience. So do not take "bad" experiences at face value - see the good.
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Step 4
Reverse Role. Put yourself in the offender's shoes. What would you have done differently? Put those thoughts on paper. Now, list causes that may have contributed to the offender's action(s). Realize that no one knows the inner thoughts or mechanics of a mind. Therefore, you cannot rightfully judge your offender - so let it go.
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Step 5
Get up from the thought of the situation. We are hurt by people intentionally and unintentionally - it's a part of living. Getting up from the thought, handles both motives. If the offender intended to hurt you, you show them you are stronger and better than the offense. This works reverse psychology. If it was not intended, you avoid maximizing the situation and bringing unnecessary stress upon you.
