How to listen carefully

I'm the type of person whose mind is racing 24 hours a day. Growing up it was hard for me to pay close attention to things that I weren't that interested in. The positive side of it is that if I'm interested in something I'll focus on it better than anybody else around.

I've conducted over 100 interviews on the radio and on camera with various entertainers and people. So, I had to develop better listening skills. I've used those skills to apply them to personal relationships and everyday life. In this article I'll give you a few steps so you'll learn how to listen more carefully and better to people.

Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• Patience
• Understanding
• Better awareness

1. In order to listen more carefully to someone, you have to take a deep breath. Calm yourself down.

2. Keep great eye contact.

3. Pay close attention to what is being said. Block everything else out that's going on around you.

4. Remember.. as Abe Lincoln said.. "To ease another's heartache is to forget one's own." - Make it a challenge for yourself to listen to the other person.. challenge yourself to listen closely and make effective responses.

5. One way to show you're listening and to make sure you understand what is being said is to repeat the speaker's thoughts in your own words. This lets the other person know that you're engaged in the conversation.. and it's also a great way of helping yourself understand better.

6. Don't interrupt! You'll have things that pop into your mind when you're in a conversation.. but that doesn't mean you have to blurt them out as soon as you think of them. Hold back.. wait until the other person is done and then make your comments.

7. Keep an open mind about the subject of the conversation.

Tips & Warnings

• It's fine if you think of things to say as the conversation rolls along. Just don't put them out there as soon as you think of something.. find a way to say those things after the person is finished talking.
• Work on this. Listening is a skill.
• Don't talk about yourself. It's okay to give examples of something related to the subject that you've experienced. But, remember, it's not always about you. Try to focus more on the person and the subject.
• If none of this works. Then, you're not a good listener. Just pretend you listen to everybody and you'll make it ok in this world.

[ElectricianDave]

on 11/2/2008 Excellent advise!
5*s

[shannonny]

on 10/30/2008 Great article! Very interesting from a professional interviewer's point of view. The world is full of conversations where each party is just waiting for the other one to shut up taking their turn! Listening is truly an art. 5 Stars.

[missnice104]

on 10/21/2008 Loved this article. It is well needed. Everyone should read and know how to be a good listener....especially if you are listening to a close friend. There's nothing more boring than a one-sided conversation. Put yourself in the other person's shoes. Great article!