How to Raise African American Girls to be Successful

There is a large percentage of African American girls that are getting stuck in unheathy relationships, have low self esteem, not finishing school, raising children on their own without any help from the fathers, and are not conducting themselves as ladies. Read this article to unleash the potential in African American girls. It is a must read for anyone who is raising African American girls.

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• Willing to break old negative stereotypical behavioral patterns.
• Willing to love yourself and take care of yourself
• Take advantge of opportunities and education for your daughter.
• Help your daughter to be the woman, wife and mother she needs be for her family.
• Break dysfunctional family patterns.
• Learn how to be proactive in dealing with racism and sexism.
• Bring back the family unit.

1. 
    
   A young girl studying.

   It is important to teach African American girls to value education at an early age.
   
   Parents should inquire about what their daughters are learning in school, ask to see homework, and by making a visit to her school. It is very important to attend teacher/ parent conferences. Let her know that you value education. Take her to the library to check out books and have her read them. Teach her to behave in school and to respect teachers. Encourage her take an interest in subjects like math and science. Many girls are not encourage like boys to excel in these subjects, especially in secondary school. Relate science and math to everyday life, like "why is the sky blue"?. Expose them to Wall Street Journal, Essence, Black enterprise magazine and etc.
   
   They should also be encouraged to participate in sports. Sports teach people how to play as a team, which can be carried over in business and other areas in life.

2. 
    
   An image of a beautiful dark skinned woman.

   Teach girls about self acceptance, self love and self respect.
   
   One way to start with self acceptance for African American girls, is to learn about their history and accomplishments that their ancestors had made in America. They should also study and read about exceptional American women who broke many barriers. The resources should include African American women as well. This will give them a reference that women can become anything they want, like CEO of a company.
   
   Most importantly, African American girls should be taught to love their skin color by exposing to them to beautiful and positive images of women who look like them. This is especially important for dark skinned girls. Tell them that they are beautiful and not to fall victim of the unrealistic media standards of beauty. Discuss the issues of light skinned vs. dark skinned in the Black community and how to break free from this negative programming. Instill in her that beauty can be found in women of all skin colors, not just one or a few. Most importantly, she must love and accept herself. Talk about the negative and positive images of women in music videos, movies, magazines, and etc.
   
   Teach them how to take care of themselves by eating healthy, drinking water, exercising, keeping their bodies clean, and looking their best. They should also be taught how to respect themselves and how act like a lady. Many young ladies curse and display very inappropriate behaviors in public, which demonstrate a lack of respect for themselves. If you don't respect yourself, how do you expect others to respect you. It is important for the mothers to set an example of what an honorable woman should act like.
   
   Teach your daughter how to be proactive in dealing with racism and sexism. Tell her this should not stop her in accomplishing her goals.

3. 
    
   A loving and honorable mother.

   Girls need to be taught how to do household chores and how to handle finances. They also need to be taught about checking accounts, savings, credit cards, IRAs, wills, and investments for the future.
   
   Do not spoil your daughters by giving everything they want and believe they could do no wrong. Being overprotective and shielding them from the outside, would cripple them and make them naive or gullible. Teach girls how be responsible and make wise choices. Many fathers make this mistake.
   
   An honorable father who is loving and respectful towards his wife, is teaching his daughter how to pick good men. Many girls get stuck in unhealthy relationships, because they did not have a good example of a healthy one or feel they are not worthy of a good relationship.
   Teach them to desire and value marriage, if they want children. It is important to teach your daughter how to find honorable husbands who are great providers. They also need to be taught how to be loving mothers and wives.

4. Have your daughter write down her goals for the future and encourage her to follow through on them. A mentor would very beneficial in getting her to stay on track.
   
   It is important communicate with your daughter about friends, boys, and etc. Do this without being judgmental or critical. Talk about sex and it consequences. Teach her not to sleep with boys to seek approval or love. Again, she must learn how to love and respect herself.
   
   Talk to her about peer pressure and her body. Thank her for coming to you for advice, if she does. Be very mindful of her friends and look out for changes in behavior.

5. It is very important for you to talk and spend sometime with your daughter everyday. Tell your daughter how much you love and care about her. Most of all love one another.

Tips & Warnings

• Mothers, you must set the example of how an honorable woman should be for your daughters. If you don't know how to be a great parent, start by reading books on the subject and take parenting classes, most states offer them for free.
• It is important for fathers to take an active role in raising their daughters, they need you just like they need their mothers.
• Single fathers should have respectable mother figures for their daughters to teach them how to be a woman.
• Check out the link below about clothing that uplift girls, especially African American girls. www.afrogirlworld.com
• Parents do not disrespect each other, physically fight or argue in front of your daughter, she will think this is normal and will continue this cycle with her children.

[maggiedarr]

on 6/19/2009 Very well written! I worked at a non-profit drug rehab years ago and heard the stories of young people who saw the lure of easy money over hard work and the results of broken or dysfunctional families. Thanks for writing such a positive article!

[keytothestars]

on 1/29/2009 Wonderful advice for parenting girls of the human race in general and I thank you for sharing. These are core values to instill in all children and necessary in developing a positive self image and good self-esteem. You're very wise. I recommended you =D

[IMDADDY]

on 12/24/2008 great article.

[Psalmist4M]

on 12/21/2008 I love Alisiane's comments about this article. It's right on point! Thanks for an insightful article. 5*s

[MIghtyDreamer]

on 12/1/2008 Well SAID