How to Cultivate Bravery

Are you a pansy? You know-- weak-willed, passive, no backbone? Do you think you might wish you could change, but aren't even sure because you lack conviction about everything? Well this article will show you, step by step, how to cultivate bravery.

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

Instructions

1. Define what kind of bravery you are seeking. If you do not define what bravery means to you, you may be tempted to chase after socio-idealized forms of bravery which, even if attainable, would not make you a better person. The best definition of worthwhile bravery is "moral courage." You may also want to add fearlessness of every day challenges, or absence of hesitation to help someone in need. This is highly individual, and completely depends on your personality and your goals.

2. Realize that this kind of bravery is within your reach, but it must be cultivated. The single most important contributor to a person's bravery is family. If there was no emphasis on bravery in your family, perhaps you will have to make up for it in other ways. No matter. There are other ways to cultivate bravery, even if you were not exposed to it a lot as a child.

3. Understand that bravery is an action, not an abstract moral concept. Bravery is nothing without implementation.

4. Any time you are feeling fear, breathe deeply, and become aware of the physical manifestations of that fear. Believe it or not, it is the sum of these manifestations that make you afraid. Once you are able to recognize them individually, and notice them, you will no longer be a slave to them. Common physical manifestations of fear include shallow breathing, a tightening chest, heightened sensory capabilities, freezing up, fluttery stomach, cold hands and feet.

5. Find situations that will stimulate your fear reactions. Hate crowds? Go to a ballgame. Chicks make you nervous? Beauty salon time. Do not do anything that will put you in physical danger. The goal here is to give yourself opportunity to observe all the physical manifestations of fear, repeatedly. You need to figure out your "fear blueprint" so that you can recognize it in an instant.

6. Now, if you are in day to day life, and you begin to manifest fear, you will see it immediately. Breathe it in, experience it, do not shut it out. This is humanity, reality, and a great way to cultivate bravery. You are gaining control of yourself and your fear. You will soon see that fear comes on you less and less in certain situations. You are above them. You are in your own space. You are in control of that space.

7. Another way to cultivate bravery is to choose a hobby or activity in which you can constantly improve your skills. Rockclimbing, cycling, or even hiking can increase your sense of self-worth and the notion that you can accomplish anything you put your mind to. If you are not athletic, you might still like to build a cabin, or accomplish some other dream you've had. If you don't like to leave the house, maybe you have been putting off making a demo tape, and now would be the perfect time to start. No time like the present, right?

8. Find greater causes to inspire you. Because after all, bravery isn't just about you, is it? Often people are willing to take initiative for others that they wouldn't take for themselves. Find a cause, figure out what ticks you off or inspires you or gets you feeling emotional one way or the other, and RUN WITH IT. Join a social group, or start blogging about property rights violations in your own neighborhood, or write an anonymous letter to the editor of a local paper. Take photos of things that piss you off and post them on the internet. Write your Congressman and let him have it. Build a doghouse for the old lady next door. Anything where you are doing something for someone else, and not yourself. Tithing some of your time to society is essential in fostering human connections and making bravery virtuous.

9. Be both realistic and optimistic. Be optimistic when it will help you improve yourself or inspire others. Be realistic when you need to formulate a plan of action. Choose based on which will help the most in a given situation. But never, ever, be pessimistic. Pessimism is uncertainty, which is the enemy of progress.

10. Read books on people that inspire you. Nien Cheng's "Life and Death in Shanghai" is a pretty amazing story of bravery. It also deconstructs the notion that bravery is only available to men. Read about middle age warriors, or Martin Luther King.

11. Consider checking out Tonglen practice, a Buddhist discipline. It will teach you to breathe in fear, and breathe out bravery.

12. Consider joining social groups that will cultivate bravery. The Mohawks became famous for the bravery in heights when they helped build the Empire State Building. They would not work with anyone who was fearful. Being around other brave people will make you brave as well.

13. Finally, be yourself. Wear your "nerdy" glasses, keep your hair a mess, work a crappy job if you love it, read what you like, and date someone that you think is hot regardless of what your friends say. A subtle routine of being yourself is the single best way to cultivate bravery in your life.

Resources

• Nien Cheng's Life and Death in Shanghai
• Tonglen Buddhism

[burlykim]

on 10/3/2008 Thanks, Mistah Norton-- Keep on bravin'!

[RENorton]

on 10/3/2008 Very interesting. This is a very well-written piece with a great perspective of bravery. Thanks!

[burlykim]

on 10/3/2008 I like that summary -- "Do It Afraid." Thanks!

[Alisiane]

on 10/2/2008 This wasn't what I expected, but it was a really good, well laid out read. Step 5 especially spoke to me. There's a quote I adopted to my list of favorites last year, and that is "Do it afraid". Fear isn't enough to keep us from trying and doing new things. There's a point where you have to push past it and Do It Afraid. Good article!