Things You'll Need:
- friends
- awareness
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Step 1
Ask yourself: Do I love them, do I hate them, or do I love to hate them. First one's a friend, second is an enemy, third is a frenemy.
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Step 2
Ask yourself: Are you at odds with them? Fiercely competitive? The Urban Dictionary defines frenemy as "Someone who is both friend and enemy, a relationship that is both mutually beneficial or dependent while being competitive, fraught with risk and mistrust. "
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Step 3
Ask yourself: Is spending time with this person draining? Do you feel exhausted by being near them? After you hang out with them, do you need a nap?
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Step 4
Ask yourself: Do you both want the same thing? Perhaps it is the same guy, the same promotion, the "A" on curved grading scale, the last size 2 dress on the rack?; but only one of you can have it? This common aim of "it" can create an all consuming game of friendly competition, ultimately turning many friends to frenemies as they leapfrog each other to get ahead. (Sadly, the game of leapfrog requires two people. Yes sometimes we need our frenemies.)
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Step 5
Ask Yourself: Do they always unload their drama all you, but they never seem to have the attention span to let you vent your drama to them?
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Step 6
Ask yourself: Do they slyly bring you down, time and time again without sincere apology, and then invite you to go tanning? Do they ask you to go shopping with them, just to rag on your taste in fashion?
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Step 7
Ask yourself: Is your first instinct when you run into this person slap them, but somehow you always manage stick around to chat it up with a giant fake smile.
Comments
cadence said
on 1/10/2009 Great info. Having a frenemy can be tough.