How to Help a Friend Deal With a Breakup

Watching a friend go through a breakup can invoke some adverse effects on your friendship as well as on your friend. A true friend will always want to help a friend through the hard times and especially when going through a breakup. Helping a friend deal with a breakup is easy as long as it is done from the heart and with some good tact.

Instructions

1. Approach your friend with caution. Although you may be good friends, some matters may be too personal during the onset of the breakup for your friend to accept help. Approach your friend with caution after the breakup, because she may still feel too wounded to deal with anything. Just be there as soon as you see she is ready for you to support her. Avoid smothering your friend and invading her personal space too much if she asks you to back off for a while.

2. Distract your friend from the breakup. If you notice your friend is constantly talking about the breakup, then it may be necessary to get his mind off the situation. Try to change the subject when he starts on these rants that are not objectively helping him come to a conclusion about the breakup. Refocusing will eventually help him get used to the thought of being without the other person.

3. Constructively talk. Avoiding conversation about the breakup is nearly impossible. In these cases, try to get your friend to come to conclusions of why things didn’t work out. This will be like counseling for your friend and will allow her to put things in perspective.

4. Take him out. Get away with your friend for a little while to give him a break. Going out will also help relieve stress. The only thing you want to avoid in this case is a favorite hangout spot of the ex or places they used to frequent together. Going to these places will only encourage more negative emotions.

5. Reinforce the positive. Let your friend know what is good about her because she will need to hear it a lot during the breakup. Reinforcing what her good points are will prevent her from getting down on herself. Many times after a breakup people tend to have bouts of low self-esteem, but this will help counteract that.

Tips & Warnings

• Above all else, be a shoulder to cry on if needed for your friend.

• Avoid bashing the ex too harshly if you suspect they may get back together, since this might cause problems in the future.