How to Avoid Family Fights

Family fights can be difficult to handle. Since you generally fight with those closest to you, it's no surprise that family will ultimately be involved. While some families are more prone to conflict than others, it's inevitable that arguments will occur in every clan at some point. While it takes some self-discipline and patience to avoid these flareups, it's well worth the effort to keep the peace in your family.

Instructions

1. Establish clear lines of communication between family members. Set aside a time every day when the family can get together to chat. A nightly dinner is a great place to communicate with one another. Such interaction is key to avoiding fights.

2. Create an environment in which family members can air their feelings. Consider instituting a weekly family meeting that will give each member a forum to discuss any particular issues that are of concern.

3. Listen to one another. Don't shut people down when they express concern over something. Fights are often a result of someone feeling as if he isn't being heard.

4. Embrace humor. A family that laughs together often is less likely to fight. Even in serious discussions, maintain a sense of humor. Keep the situation fun and you'll likely make more progress together.

5. Forgive. Don't harbor grudges toward family members. Once an issue has been resolved, move on from it. Avoid bringing up past issues in current discussions.

6. Use neutral terms in discussions. Though it can be tempting, avoid blaming someone else for how you feel. Instead, articulate your feelings clearly and avoid absolutes.

7. Surrender your desire to be right. Families are so dynamic because every member is different. Don't try to convert other people to your way of thinking all the time. Appreciate your differences and sometimes simply agree to disagree.

8. Step away from the situation if you feel you are losing control. Sometimes it's best to take some time to cool off and then enter into the discussion at a later time. You won't accomplish much in the discussion if you are angry.

9. Respect one another. No matter how passionate you feel about a particular issue, it's important to show respect for each member of the family. Never insult or name-call. It's counterproductive and merely leads to fights.

Tips & Warnings

• If you have trouble articulating yourself, try writing a letter to a family member. You may find that you express yourself better on paper than verbally.

• Never resort to physical violence.