How to Restore Our Sense of Common Purpose

On the 45th anniversary of Martin Luther King Jr.'s historical "I have a dream" speech, Barack Obama received his party's nomination for presidency of the United States. In his acceptance speech, Obama said that our country has lost "our sense of common purpose -- our sense of higher purpose. And that's what we have to restore." These words went straight to my gut and filled me at once with hope and with sorrow. I had visited my grandmother a few weeks prior to hearing Obama's speech. During our time together, my grandmother showed me her books of unused ration stamps that the country was given during WWII. As I leafed through those fragile booklets, I imagined my grandmother and her fellow U.S. citizens making personal sacrifices so that the troops could eat and so that Europe could rebuild after the war. I could not imagine this type of sacrifice happening today. It is not my intent to romanticize life in the 1940s or to push a specific political agenda. I am, however, compelled to explore the idea of common purpose and reconcile how we -- as individuals living in a diverse "melting pot" society that has scant cultural glue and emphasizes personal gain over collective good -- can live in a way that enables us to reach our personal goals while simultaneously benefiting the whole. May these tips begin to light our path!

Instructions

1. Define yourself and others using only one universal label: Human. We cause a divide the instant we put a person into a category. While individuals are impossible to ignore, groups are easy to dismiss, persecute, alienate and demonize. Rich vs. poor, gay vs. straight, woman vs. man, Evangelical vs. Agnostic, Sunni vs. Shiite, tall vs. short, trendy vs. unfashionable--the list is endless. Forget "them;" there is only "us."

2. Focus on what we all agree upon. We all want a safe place to sleep, clean water to drink, opportunities to learn, satisfying work, compassionate human contact and a body free of injury and disease. How we achieve these things doesn't matter. What matters is that we do achieve these things for all to enjoy.

3. Spend time in public places. Visit the library. Travel by bus. Participate in community events. Attend public hearings. Stroll through the park. The more you actively participate in the public sphere, the more you will understand the importance of preserving and improving the spaces that belong to everyone.

4. Act small. A friend of mine recently confided in me that she feels resentful when she hears about the charitable acts of celebrities. "Don't get me wrong; I'm glad they're using their power to help the world, but come on! They're rich and they have publicity teams behind them. It's easy for them to give big." I understand my friend's feelings. For some, hearing about the grand good deeds of others is inspiring, while for others it is defeating. If you fall into the latter group, do not let fear of not doing enough stop you from doing anything at all. Take baby steps and give in ways that fit your life and your means. Pick up trash as you walk down the street, volunteer for a few hours every week, cook dinner for your grandmother. Your small acts definitely won't create hype, but they definitely will help.

5. Stand up for those who cannot stand up for themselves. Jesus may have turned the other cheek, but he also stood up for the poor, the persecuted and the disenfranchised. Ghandi may have believed in peaceful protest, but he certainly was not meek when it came to standing up against tyranny. Fight bullies. Blow the whistle on thieves. Do not tolerate abusive, hateful or dishonest behavior from anyone including yourself, your children, your loved ones or your distant acquaintances. Show compassion and insist that all who come near you do the same.

6. If you don't need it, don't buy. I know that you know the difference between a need and a want. Be honest with yourself and work toward buying only what you need.

7. Think before you have babies. One of the biggest threats facing the health of our planet is overpopulation. Bring a child into this world only if having a baby is the deepest, purest, strongest longing in your soul. To do otherwise is selfish and irresponsible.

8. Find your talent, use your skills and take pride in your work. You do not benefit anybody (not yourself or society) by diminishing your brilliance, ignoring your callings, squelching your truth or sitting on your ass. As Charlotte Perkins Gilman said, "The first duty of a human being is to assume the right functional relationship to society -- more briefly, to find your real job, and do it."

9. Move through life with slow, careful awareness. I cannot think of a single thing that a person does well under stress that he or she couldn't do better while relaxed. The faster you move, the more likely you are to plow over others both physically and emotionally. Be relaxed when you drive, grocery shop, brush your teeth, talk, text, think.

10. Know that you know nothing. The more certain you are that your position is the right position, the less you will be able to bridge gaps with others who hold different, yet equally valid points of view. Approach every day as though you have everything to learn, approach every person you encounter as though he or she is your greatest teacher.

11. Acknowledge that you are a small part of something much larger than yourself. Albert Einstein said it better than I ever could, so I'll let him take the stage and finish this out: "A human being experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest--a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty. Nobody is able to achieve this completely, but the striving for such achievement is in itself a part of the liberation and a foundation for inner security."