How to Prepare Kids for Jail Visits
Visiting a friend or family member when she is incarcerated is hard enough when you're an adult, let alone a child. Learning how to prepare kids for jail visits to see one of their parents takes time, patience and understanding. Children react differently to stress and disappointment; especially if their mother or father does something illegal. The person that they trust the most has just done something wrong and it feels as if they are being punished for it as well by having to be apart from them. Before you bring a young person to see someone who is an inmate, preparing them for the experience is in every one's best interest.
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Instructions
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Find out ahead of time if the children are going to be allowed to have any direct physical contact with the inmate. Some facilities to not allow this for safety purposes. If a child is not going to be allowed to hug or kiss their father or mother, it's best to explain the situation to them before you go visiting an incarcerated parent. Not being able to hold or be held by a parent can be one the greatest emotional tolls on youngsters. Preparing them for only being able to see and talk to their loved one is the greatest defense against the shock.
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Explain that their parent may look different. When figuring out how to prepare kids for jail visits, it is also best to talk to the child about how his father or mother may not look the same as when they do at home. Being incarcerated usually means no makeup or street clothes. Plus, the time apart from family and friends can take a toll on the inmate as well. It is not uncommon for children to be shocked at the weary and tired look on their loved one's face. Even seeing them in a standard uniform may be enough to scare a younger person. If they have ever seen crime or court shows, the fear may run even deeper, making them feel as if their mom or dad is not the same person anymore.
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Let them tell you what they are scared of before and after visiting their mother or father. The main key to figuring out how to prepare kids for jail visits is to listen to all of their feelings about their parent being incarcerated. Knowing that they do not have to feel ashamed or embarrassed to talk to you will make it easier for them to become more comfortable with the situation. Telling a child that he can express his anger, fears and disappointments without worrying about hurting his mom or dad's feeling is one of the best ways for preparing him. Children need to know that they have nothing to do with their loved one committing the crime, no matter what guilt they may be experiencing, and that they have a right to feel however they feel about the situation.
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Get him a journal or notebook, if he is older, to record his emotions in if he can't bring himself to talk about them. Since everyone reacts in a different way, giving them an outlet to vent is one of the best ways to figure out how to prepare kids for jail visits.
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