How to Save a Marriage After Cheating
Cheating on your spouse is undeniably the easiest and quickest way to destroy a marriage. Emotions are bound to run high. The spouse who has been cheated on feels hurt and angry, but most of all she feels betrayed. The spouse often feels victimized. The injured spouse has been hurt by the person she trusted the most. It will be difficult to trust that person again. Although it is difficult to re-build a marriage once it has been decimated by infidelity, it is not impossible.
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Instructions
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Talk to your spouse openly and honestly. Explain why you cheated. What were you thinking? Did you think about your spouse's feelings? Your spouse may say that he doesn't want to hear any explanation and may accuse you of making excuses, but he has the same questions running through his mind. In all actuality your spouse may need to hear your explanation. But if your spouse is not ready to hear what you have to say don't force the issue. Drop it and wait until he is ready to listen. Trying to talk to your spouse when he is not ready to listen will only cause conflict. Wait until the time is right for an open, honest discussion.
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Accept responsibility for your actions. Let your spouse know that she is not to blame in any way for your behavior. Often a spouse that has been cheated on will feel that she must have done something wrong. The spouse who is the victim often feels that she is at fault. It is important that you reassure your spouse that you are responsible for your own actions.
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Let your spouse know that you understand it will take him time to forgive and trust you again. Tell your spouse that you are willing to wait and that you will take whatever steps necessary to regain his trust. Assure your spouse that you are sincerely sorry for your actions and that you love him and want to make your marriage work.
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Give it time. Infidelity changes people and circumstances. Your marriage will not automatically go back to the way it was before the cheating occurred. Accept that fact and work one day at a time to re-build the relationship. Give your spouse time to heal.
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Resources
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Comments
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Pretty much have no faith in this article since it is very obviously slanted. So, this is advice for women... what about men?
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Yea. I have agree w/ the McNeil's, The woman is usually cooking the stew and stirring it up , so the man just has to have a taste. All looking and smiling and strutting what else is the poor soul suppose to think. Look up to the sky and say "is this a TEST". You never know.
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my wife doesn't listen to no one.
