How to Visit with a Person with Dementia

A loved one or friend whom has developed a form of dementia is often difficult to visit with. Memories which are no longer clear may provoke discomfort for all parties involved. In changing the way information is presented and providing cues visits can be enjoyable for all.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Challenging

Things You’ll Need:

• Patience
• Sense of Humor
• Memories of Enjoyable Times
• Photo Album (optional)

1. Enter the area in which the individual is in. Prior to initiating conversation present an open gesture. An open gesture is beneficial such as an open hand with palm up allows the individual to choose to shake or hold hand. While also allowing the person a choice. Prior to talking, get to eye level with the individual. For example, if in a wheel chair sit on chair next to or squat down. If individual has a hearing aid, pay attention to talk to that side. Watch for nonverbal such as eye contact or nodding to ensure individual is engaged.
2. Introduce yourself with a smile such as, "Hi Uncle Jack. It's Carla, your niece." Asking questions at conversation initiation such as, "Do you remember me?", may be asking the individual more than they are able which may place the person on the defense. Verbal cues allow the person to remain in comfort zone and feel a connection at onset.
3. Allow the individual with dementia to lead the conversation. Be in the conversation with the person. Reality Orientation has in my experience not been productive to good interactions. A person whom is in their nineties but memories have regressed to when in their twenties will not remember their spouse has passed perhaps. To introduce to the person this fact could be upsetting. Instead, be in the conversation. For example: If the person is stating their car is in the parking lot. A possible response would be, "What color is your car." Take the conversation from this point. Talk about a favorite road trip or other related memory. Ask of their memory. The memory will provoke more.
4. Please take each moment for what it is. The gift to both parties can not have a price placed upon it. A smile is contagious. A photo album of personal pictures or of magazine cuttings can be a great conversation starter. Even to the late stages of dementia the opportunity to communicate and to be included remains. Those emotions are craved and powerful. It is a personal investment for all.

Tips & Warnings

• Popular Conversation Topics: Children, Animals, Summer/Winter Activities
• Never walk up behind a individual to move them without their knowledge or touch them without their permission. This may startle the person or cause stress. Approach from the front. Engage verbally, by eye contact or touch with permission in case the individual does not recall you.