How to Get Rid of a Loser Date - For Her

You weren't expecting your date to be such a loser! How do you dump him without making a scene? Make it his choice. Disclaimer: Actually following this advice could make you feel like a loser yourself. If you want to be classy and kind, this may not be the best strategy.

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• Handbags
• Tampons
• Magazines
• Magazines
• Magazines

1. Be strategic - different losers require different techniques. Some take more time than others to get the hint.

2. Bore your date. Offer only the most mundane things about yourself. Look at your knees and mumble. Sigh a lot.

3. Stare blankly when he tells a joke. Laugh inappropriately.

4. Ignore your date. Bring a magazine to read ' the more unlikely, the better: "Highlights for Children," "Soldier of Fortune," "Rod & Custom." Hold your place on the page while you answer questions in monosyllables.

5. Call him by several different wrong names.

6. Show off some less desirable personal habits - grind your teeth, crack your knuckles, chew gum, sniffle and swallow loudly, take food from his plate, swap straws with him every fifth sip. Tap your nails on the table. Snicker for no reason.

7. Worry him. Say wistfully, "My finger is so terribly cold without a ring." Excuse yourself to call your psychiatrist or your mama.

8. Scare him. When he puts his hand on your arm or thigh, inhale sharply and start choking. Wave your hand around meaninglessly while he tries to figure out what's wrong. Do this every time he touches you.

9. Embarrass him. Ask the waiter if the restaurant has any live food. Dig through your purse; pull out random items and set them on the table. The more personal the better.

Tips & Warnings

• Be prepared to pick up the tab and find alternate transportation, if necessary.

[clothilde77]

on 8/6/2008 Very funny and it would be tempting to ask people how indeed they dumped (gently) a loser date. No one wants to come off a meanie.

[boltonsgirl]

on 7/8/2007 how great is this? i love this article, it's great! i will deffo use it if i ever have a loser date.

[CopyCat]

on 5/26/2007 As the author of this particular eHow article (back in 1999), I want to point out that it was written tongue-in-cheek, for entertainment purposes. It seems to me that this article has inspired a lot of discussion concerning respect for self and others and while I wholeheartedly agree, I'm afraid you have missed the point. And to those of you who offered up additional suggestions, kudos!

[tickleberries]

on 4/5/2007 Start the date by saying, "Wow, this is so cool. I don't usually go out with real people, being mentally ill and all."
Of course, I'm just kidding. Honesty is always best.

[tickleberries]

on 4/5/2007 Just start the date with, "It isn't often I date, being mentally ill and all."