Things You'll Need:
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Step 1
Broach the subject of dating early on, perhaps during your child's junior high school years, or even sooner.
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Step 2
Set down some basic rules, including what you consider a proper dating age for both your teen and the teen's dates. Also discuss expectations about group or single dating, curfews, and appropriate destinations. For example, you might feel that only group dating is appropriate until age 16 or that teens should not leave your town or city on their dates.
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Step 3
Put all of your rules and expectations in an informal written document that you share with your teen. As your teen matures, bring it out and make changes if appropriate.
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Step 4
Talk with your teen about issues of sex and morality. In addition to discussing your moral views, talk about AIDS, sexually transmitted diseases, pregnancy and emotional issues related to sex - critical issues for teens. If you have trouble communicating about these issues with your teen or if you feel that your child is experiencing problems that are too large for you to handle, get help from a counselor, clergy member or medical professional.
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Step 5
Explain that if your teen winds up in a difficult situation, you are willing and available to pick him or her up - whenever or wherever that might be, no questions asked.
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Step 6
Tell your teen where in the house to find some extra cash in case he or she is going out and doesn't have money available. Your teen should always carry enough cash to take a cab home in case of emergency.
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Step 7
Insist that your teen's date come into the house upon arrival for an introduction. Small talk and friendly questions are fine - this is not the best time for interviews, warnings or giving the third degree.
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Step 8
Make yourself available after the date to talk if your child wants to. Show your interest, but avoid prying. If you decide not to wait up that night, be sure to let your child know beforehand that you'll be available to chat in the morning.
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Step 9
Keep your ears, eyes and mind as open as possible. A parent's intuition will often spot the first signs of trouble, whether that means alcohol, drugs, an abusive relationship, a significant age difference, or anything else that worries you.
Comments
eeevie said
on 9/22/2009 Yes because obviously never letting your kid know about sex is the way to go around it, ignorance is key because clearly you are the only person in the world capable of making a choice. You're the ugliest kind of religion follower, you have no common sense because you have never had to think for yourself.
crobs808 said
on 5/22/2009 Anonymous - NOOO!! Do NOT learn to be the kids "friend"! this is the problem parents have these days! They are trying to be their kids best buddy, when they should not, they should be their PARENT! Your kid should not ever call you their best friend, as this is unhealthy. There NEEDS to be that authoritarian separation between parent and child in order to maintain respect! What is wrong with parents these days?
crobs808 said
on 5/22/2009 Wow...another HORRIBLE parenting how-to on this site. I sure hope nobody is using this for their sole source for parenting. Why on earth would you talk to them abotu diseases and AIDS?!!! The fact that they should not be even having sex at all should be talked about, and if you are following Christ, as everyone should be, you never even need to talk about it. My parents NEVER gave me "the talk", and I stayed a virgin until I was married, because it honors God...what is wrong with parents these days? Take an offensive approach, not defensive right off the bat!
trenee169 said
on 1/12/2009 When It comes to our kids, and if we really love them.....We better began falling to our knees...because if you tried everything else and you are absolutely exhausted..then began to pray for your child. If you don't believe in God...Then go ahead and allow your heart to broken a few million times first, because thats what it will take for you to try God. Just TRY HIM!
MominNC said
on 7/3/2007 A Mom who needs help - my son, age 16 and his girlfriend, age 16 got themselves in trouble and she ended up with an abortion. I didn't even know this girl existed. Now my eyes and ears are open completely and I have established some dating house rules that he is fighting me on completely. Please share your thoughts. Rule 1 She must provide her on transportation to and from my house majority of the time. Rule 2 She can only visit up to 10:30 p.m. on non school nights. Rule 3 she must stay down stairs in the rec room with the door open, Rule 4 Both of them must be sitting up at all times. No one is allowed to lie down. I need you help because we are struggling terribly.