How to Get on a Professor's Bad Side

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By eHow Contributing Writer

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(38 Ratings)

If you don't want to be on good terms with your professor, it won't take much effort to reach your goal.
UNPOSTED 8/6/99

Difficulty: Easy

Instructions

Step 1

Skip the first class of the term. Later, ask for all the materials your professor handed out the first day. Ask, "Did I miss anything important?"
Step 2

Arrive late most days. If you are attending a lecture, walk to the front of the hall, choose a seat in the middle of the front row and ask those around you what you've missed while you unzip your backpack and unload it.
Step 3

Eat breakfast/lunch/dinner during class: choose chips in crinkly plastic bags, soda cans that pop when opened and large tupperware bowls filled with last night's casserole.
Step 4

Talk to your friends while the professor is speaking, read the paper, avoid taking your books to class, keep your baseball cap on or take a nap.
Step 5

Ask for special appointments to see your professor because his or her office hours are too early in the morning.
Step 6

Have your professor "go over" your paper several times before you turn it in. Later tell him/her you should have gotten a higher grade because you worked so hard in coming in for help and he/she is not helping you enough.
Step 7

Email your professor continually asking for "clarifications" on the assignment, or leave long, rambling messages on his or her voicemail asking for a return call even if it's long distance.
Step 8

Dominate class discussion, find a counterpoint to every statement the professor makes, and get yourself noticed in a large lecture by raising your hand at regular intervals to ask a question that you and only you are "concerned" about.

Comments

dearlonda said

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on 2/25/2009 lol. Love the feel of this article! Check out my "How to NOT Earn Money on eHow. It has a similar humor angle. Thanks for the laugh and info.

KTMg said

on 2/21/2009 LOL - You forgot to mention that you should spill your soda onto your professor, and if at all possible find a cute/sarcastic nickname for their haircut!