How to Catch a Cheating Spouse

Changes in your spouse's behavior may lead you to suspect cheating. The worry that follows is all-consuming and the cause of many sleepless night. To put the issue to rest, experts recommend quietly monitoring the spouse's activities for two weeks. At the end of that period, use the information to either confront the spouse or put the issue to rest.

Instructions

1. Jot down the spouse's activities in a journal. Keep track of the dates and times, reported destinations and other parties said to be present or involved. Mention outings casually in front of parties who were said to be involved.

2. Check the journal entries against credit card statements, bank records and ATM withdrawals. Look for credit card transactions at restaurants where the spouse reportedly ate. Make a note of expenditures at places other than the reported locations.

3. Review cell phone records, which list all incoming and outgoing calls and their duration. Look for repeated calls to and from unfamiliar numbers. Use an online reverse number look-up service to determine to whom the number belongs.

4. Check the incoming and outgoing text messaging on the cell phone regularly. Examine the cell phone contacts to see the name label on the phone number to which the texts are sent. Use "caller ID spoofing" to call suspicious numbers (see Resources).

5. Observe activities at office gatherings or work functions. Notice when the spouse avoids a specific co-worker but keeps track of the individual's movements and exchanges frequent looks.

6. Come home early from work. Announce plans to work late and then arrive home early. Drop in at the office and surprise the spouse with a lunch invitation. Observe the reaction or make notes as to the spouse's absence from the office.

7. Install monitoring software on the home computer that allows the recording of online chat, web surfing, logon info and passwords. Look for memberships to online dating services.

Tips & Warnings

• Don't confront a spouse unless you have indisputable evidence of cheating. Don't reveal all the evidence at once. Give a small amount of information and see how the spouse responds before revealing more evidence.

• Look over cell phone records for a pattern of the same number called around the time the spouse leaves for work and again right before the spouse returns home.

• Think ahead and be prepared to deal with the findings when you attempt to catch a cheating spouse.

Resources

• Free reverse-phone look-up
• Computer monitoring
• Caller ID Spoofing