How to be a Caregiver for your immediate family

The purpose of this article is to provide hope and help for the parent or parents of children with disabilities. The key is to be a loving caregiver and parent and not lose site of your own needs and life's purpose.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Challenging

Things You’ll Need:

• Daily Devotions
• Daily Plan
• Journal
• Support System (friends and family you trust)
• Family Doctors you trust
• Courage to fight for your children when no one else understands them
• Perseverance as they grow and mature
• A sense of humor
• A loving Spouse
• Your personal vision and goals
• A mentor or coach
• Optimism
• Unconditional love

1. Be truthful with yourself and accept what the diagnosis IS today.
   Things may change tomorrow; however, it is important to be honest
   about what IS happening and what your child or spouses's medical
   treatment is.
2. As your Doctors as many questions as you need and share the key facts.
   Gain a full picture of causes, medications that may help and changes that may be needed at home as part of the treatment and recovery.
3. When multiple family members have the same disability (genetic), there will be lots of information the doctors will share and ask for.
   
   Keep a notebook of information: symptoms, behavior, sleeping, eating,
   moods, etc.
4. Be honest with your family about what the illness or disability is and
   what will be needed to care for them and yourself. Communicate often.
5. Keep a schedule of activities, appointments, medications to be taken, etc. Share responsibility of placing the information on a family calendar.
6. Share the responsibility of holding each person accountable for taking
   meds and following the doctor's guidance. Follow-up on each other in love by simply asking the right questions such as, "Have you taken your meds this morning or how are doing with....?"
7. Inform key individuals who need to know the family members medical information including medications being taken, including school nurses, school counselors or baby sitters. Always leave cell phone numbers and back-up phone numbers in case of an emergency.
8. Schedule down-time, self-care and self interests that make you who you are. The key is to find a balance between caring for others and caring for yourself.
9. Hire others to care for you. Schedule hair appointments, manicures,
   shopping trips, etc., for YOU. Schedule other dates for you and your spouse.
10. Solicit help from family members and friends for whatever your needs
    are. When you have a need, do not give up until you find a resource to fill the need. As a Caregiver and Parent or Spouse it is important that needs are met so you will be able to provide the service to the best of your ability.
11. Take it a day at a time, be kind to yourself and know that tomorrow holds opportunities for change, healing and health. This too shall pass!
12. Take care of your own health: mind, body and spirit. Rest and exercise. Get your yearly check-ups done. Do what you need to do to stay healthy and happy with you!

Tips & Warnings

• If you find things to be overwhelming-reach out to friends and loved ones you can talk to.
• Reach out to your Family Doctor, Counselor or Therapist. When you feel the need, find a way to get help.
• Ask the family members for help; let them do whatever they are capable of without causing harm to themselves. Being disabled or sick doesn't mean they are helpless!
• Build your faith and support system. Find a support group or church.
• Pray for help, healing and health.
• Be thankful for what you have and the health your family DOES have.
• Thank others who are a support and service to your family members; many times they serve because they love people and care. A thank you goes a long way and provides encouragement.
• No matter how tough the day...do not lose HOPE!
• Do not give up!
• If you get tired and worn out; do what you need to regroup. Seek help, take a break if you need to and come back refreshed.
• If you feel it is too much to handle, find alternatives which will help your loved ones get the quality care they need. It is OK to say "THIS IS TOO MUCH FOR ME!"