How to Cope With A Long Distance Relationship

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Too many miles in between
Too many miles in between (Image: http://flickr.com/photos/estradasbiz/112859062/)

A long distance relationship is a journey that you take with someone that you can’t imagine being without. While there may be millions of other potential loves in your local area, none compare to the one that is thousands of miles away. Be warned that a long distance relationship is not going to be easy. Anyone that has been brave enough to experience this emotional roller coaster will agree on one simple fact. These types of relationships are hard. There will be moments in which it feels like every bone in your body aches and longs for your significant other. Couples that are holding hands will make you yearn to feel his touch. You will feel this indescribable envy and sadness when happy couples walk by. If fate has thrown you into a long distance relationship, here are some helpful coping tips from someone who has been there.

Expectations. At the beginning of your long distance relationship, you must have a serious discussion on what you both expect. Rules and boundaries must be discussed. This will help to prevent misunderstandings and hurt feelings. For example, will you be allowed to date other people? Is the relationship over if you cheat or will you work through it? Is he as committed as you are? Will one of you relocate? How often should you visit each other? These are important questions that the couple must know the answers to if their relationship is to succeed.

Stay loyal and devoted to the relationship. Temptation is always there even in the best of relationship. The cute guy at work who showers you with compliments and attention can easily spell trouble for your long distance relationship. Even if there isn’t a chance that your boyfriend will know that you cheated, you will know. The guilt of betrayal will corrode and eventually destroy your relationship. Be truthful with yourself. Can you really be faithful to someone that is not in your physical presence? If you can't honestly commit to faithfulness, you will save the two of you a lot of heartache down the road. Do not even begin a long distance relationship if you know deep down that you can’t be faithful to one another.

Appreciate each other. Don’t take your relationship for granted. It is hard to find true love in this world as evident by the millions of dating sites on the web. We are all looking for someone to share our hopes and dreams with. We need someone to travel beside us on our life’s path. Count yourself lucky if you find someone that helps you to be optimistic even when it feels as if the world is crumbling at your feet.

Take time for each other. There are moments in life when our lives are so busy that it's hard to find time to breathe but its crucial that you find a sliver of time for your relationship. A few minutes can go a long way in maintaining a successful relationship.

Keep a journal. This will save your sanity when you miss your girlfriend. Write down moments that you have shared together and things that make you smile. Even though she may not be with you in the physical sense, this journal is a reminder of how special your relationship is. It will reinforce the reason why you are with her and why you are willing to sacrifice so much.

Accept that you will fight. Couples that are in a long distance relationship may fight more often. Emotions tend to run very high when you are unable to be with the one you love. Words can easily be misunderstood. Each disagreement should be viewed as an obstacle that you will overcome and will bring you closer together. Always find ways to resolve the issue that caused the fight. Don’t let it eat away at your relationship. It is better to deal with it and get past it.

Say I love you. If your relationship is at a stage where these three important words have been exchanged, don’t forget to say them often. Share your feelings with each other.

Tips & Warnings

  • Do everything that you can to make your boyfriend feel as if he is a part of your life. Daily e-mails or text messages will let him know that he is in your thoughts even if you are physically separated.
  • Do the unexpected. Send her a surprise gift or flowers and don’t tell her about it.
  • Remember how important your relationship is. Never jeopardize it by cheating. If you want out of your relationship, talk to your boyfriend before you get involved with another. Always end one relationship before beginning another.
  • Continue to have your social life. Go out with friends and family. Take up a new hobby. Its important that you don’t isolate yourself.
  • Remember that there are many interesting things in life that are worth exploring. Pursue a new hobby or join a support group for long distance relationships.
  • Realize that it is extremely difficult to make this type of relationship work.
  • Friends and family may not understand why you want to suffer through a long distance relationship.

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