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Step 1
First, we must free ourselves of guilt. Yes, our parents are aging. It's a fact of life, but we are not to blame because they have lost a mate or their bodies are deteriorating. Once we accept that we cannot stop the aging process, than we are ready to care for the elderly and help them cope with the changes.
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Step 2
Healthy Aging: Sometimes It's DifficultLearning to communicate is the most important task we face as our parents try to hide their true feelings. Before we can understand them, we need to understand the times that they grew up in. Most elderly people were taught to keep their feelings suppressed and never discuss issues with their children. Remember, "Children are to be seen, not heard." So when they refuse to tell us what ails them, it's because we are the children; they are the parent. Be patient and observe. Mom may not let you know about her personal problems, and Dad may not want to go to the social because he's afraid.
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Step 3
Be attentive. Sometimes it's tough, but let Mom vent. If she lives alone, she needs to talk. Show that you are listening by nodding and repeating some of what she says. Don't judge. Our parents have a right to their opinions, no matter how we feel about the issues.
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Step 4
Caring for Our ParentsFinally, spend time with your parents. Take them out for coffee. Have physical contact with a touch of the hand or a hug. Ask their opinion on different subjects. Play games, watch their favorite tv show, and have dinner with them. Show them they are still important.
Comments
slphilbrick said
on 9/10/2008 I LOVE this ..... I have cared for elderly relatives and have had several senior massage clients. My clients, especially, have taught me so much in how to be a part of an elder's life. Americans (especially) don't know how to REALLY take care of their elders so I hope lots and lots and lots more people read this !!
TorchLady said
on 6/10/2008 Well done-the guilty part hit home!!