Things You'll Need:
- A Bible
- Some Guidelines
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Step 1
Know what God's word says about dating. The Bible may not use the words "dating," but it does refer to sexual purity, adultery, and fornication. By researching these topics, we can see how God feels about them. We know that God created man and woman so that they could become one (in marriage). They are to become one sexually, emotionally, and spiritually. This kind of connection is meant to only take place between one man and one woman and only after marriage.
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Step 2
Take in to consideration what God says about maintaining our Christian testimony. The Bible does talk about striving not to cause another Christian to stumble. Having sex outside of marriage is a sin; if you participate, you could also cause other Christians to do the same thing. We need to create guidelines that will keep our Christian image intact.
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Step 3
Create your own guidelines based on God's word. Guidelines could include: only dating in public settings, or only going on group dates. Never be alone with your date or enter a bedroom together.
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Step 4
Make sure your date is a born again Christian. Make sure they are active in a church, not just someone who goes on Sundays or on holidays. The Bible tells us not to be unequally yoked for a reason; God is trying to help us not be mean to us. Finding a date that has a genuine love for God will benefit you in many ways. If you are both committed Christians, you will be on the same spiritual page and your date will be less likely to pressure you into doing something you know you shouldn't be doing. You want your date to consider your purity and reputation as something to be honored.
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Step 5
Get an accountability partner. This should be someone from your church or bible study that you can call and be honest with. Choose an accountability partner that has the same values that you do. You are less likely to do wrong things when you know you must give an account for your actions.
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Step 6
Seek your Pastor's advice. If you find, after dating for a little while, that you might want to marry your date, you should get your Pastor involved. Consider premarital counseling so you can have a chance to talk about any issues you and your date might not have thought to discuss.
Comments
rafapraga said
on 9/5/2009 Part 2 of 2:
What would you recommend the boyfriend in how to show his affection for her when she comes back? The answer cannot be: dating on a public site. There's a high chance that the boyfriend would feel emotionally forced to pick his girlfriend at the airport and take her to her apartment and then end up giving her very intense kisses and then, touching her intensively.
Ok... I hope this enriches the conversation. I really want Christian couples to be able to have happy marriages, please God and all kinds of beautiful ideals.
rafapraga said
on 9/5/2009 (CORRECTION TO THE PREVIOUS COMMENT)
Part 1 of 2:
I am a Christian who wants to please God and who wants to respect his girlfriend. Nevertheless, I think that we should be more creative in giving ideas to couples to avoid having sex. I don't think that just making sure that your partner is active at Church is enough. I think that a lot of Christian couples have it clear that it's important not to have sex or engage on sexual games with his or her date. Nevertheless, they struggle in expressing their affection. For example, suppose a girlfriend has to go to another country for 2 or 4 weeks. And suppose that this girlfriend lives all by herself in her apartment.
rafapraga said
on 9/5/2009 I am a Christian who wants to please God and how wants to respect his girlfriend. Nevertheless, I think that we should be more creative in giving ideas to couples to avoid having sex. I don't think that just making sure that your partner is active is enough. I think that a lot of Christian couples have it clear that it's important not to have sex or engage on sexual games with his or her date. Nevertheless, they struggle in expressing their affection. For example, suppose a girlfriend has to go to another country for 2 or 4 weeks. And suppose that this girlfriend lives all by herself in her apartment. What would you recommend the boyfriend in how to show his affection for her when she comes back? The answer cannot be: dating on a public site. There's a high chance that the boyfriend would feel emotionally forced to pick his girlfriend at the airport and take her to her apartment and ...
maggy50 said
on 11/4/2008 my son is a christian male, 37yrs old, dating a christian girl, my problem is that they frequently go to his apt. alone to watch movies, she cooks for him etc etc, I tolds him this was wrong but hes adamant its not and they have pledged themselves to God and nothing will ever happen sexually. how can I get him to see the danger he's putting himself in?