How to Tell Someone You Want a Divorce

Telling your significant other you want a divorce is one of the scariest, most emotional things a person can do. Not only is it difficult for you, but it will also be crushing for the other person. Never spontaneously drop this information. Always plan ahead, so you are composed and present your wishes clearly.

Instructions

1. Speak compassionately to your mate. Even though you are calling for an end to your relationship, you need to make this moment as gentle as possible. You do not want to hurt the other person's feelings unnecessarily, because you will inevitably have to see each other again whether it is to deal with property, children or court appearances.

2. Tell your mate this news in a secure place. Since this will be emotional for both of you and potentially embarrassing for the other person, avoid public places where the chances of deepening the wound are greater. However, if you are worried for your own safety, bring a trusted friend or family member to your secure place for support.

3. Lay out your decisions for the divorce as clearly as possible. Your spouse will ask you why you are asking for a divorce and it is your responsibility to provide reasons. If it helps, write out a list of reasons and examples on a card. You will be emotional and may lose your train of thought, a note will help you stay focused.

4. Make it clear to your mate that this decision for a divorce is final. It is human nature to ask for another chance. But if you have thought out your decision this far, hopefully you are confident in its finality. Calmly explain that there is no other option in this case but divorce.

5. Remain calm and stay in control. Your spouse will be emotional and upset. However, if the spouse becomes belligerent, verbally abusive or violent, it will be best to leave.