How to Be Friends With a Cynic

Cynics are all around us. We see them in supermarkets, at the mall and in the car wash. We also encounter them at work, in our families and among our friends. Yes, it's true, we've chosen to have these people in our lives by befriending them. Now we need ideas for maintaining that chosen friendship without pitching the friend through the wall during moments of cynicism.

Instructions

1. Keep an open mind and do your best to see why your friend is a cynic. She might have been burned in the past by being too trusting, or she might have issues from her childhood. Asking about past relationships is not necessarily a bad thing or too nosy. She may want to share.

2. Value his opinion. Just because he's cynical doesn't mean he's wrong. Investigate the possibility that his concerns are valid and he's not just trying to rain on your parade.

3. Discard her opinion if you decide her concerns aren't valid. She might be trying to rain on your parade, and if you believe that's the case, it's better to ignore the cynic's outlook and develop a more positive one yourself.

4. Tell him to shut up if his rants are getting too distracting. If he respects you, a friend gives you space. If he cares about you, he gives you support. If the cynic can't be a friend to you, consider taking a break from working so hard to be his friend.

5. Take time away from your cynical friend. She drains your positive energy, and you need to replenish that before you see her again and go back to that stressful situation.

Tips & Warnings

• Whatever he does, keep caring about your friend and be as supportive and positive as you can. When he sees this, he appreciates it.

• If you feel like your friend is becoming more closed off rather than opening up, take a step back and give her space. Developing a trusting relationship takes time, and it will take effort on your part toward your cynical friend.