How to Handle an Abusive Relationship

The biggest key to handling an abusive relationship is getting out of it.

When you first met he was loving and kind. Now he’s abusive and evil. Too many women, and even men, end up in an abusive relationship with no clue as to how to handle it. You can handle an abusive relationship, with the main goal of getting out of it, with some strategic steps.

Instructions

1. Figure out what triggers the abuse and avoid those situations. Maybe he gets mad when you spend money, so hide any purchases. Perhaps he blows up when you go out with your friends. Tell him, instead, you have a dentist appointment.

2. Ignore his remarks. Abusive people will try to tear you down at every turn, calling you stupid, fat, ugly and a whole host of other fine adjectives. Know in your heart you are smart, healthy and beautiful and try to let the remarks run off you like water.

3. Duck his blows. If the abusive person likes to hit you, make sure you become very quick on your feet to avoid his punches. Also become a master at running very quickly, so you can get yourself out the front door or to a locked first floor room where you can climb out the window.

4. Seek therapy and a network of friends. This will help bolster your self esteem as well as give you people to whom to vent your frustrations. They will also give you an honest assessment of your abusive relationship so you can see it’s not worth putting up with.

5. Get out. Nothing should hold you in an abusive relationship, not kids, pets, money or a house on a hill. Material things can be replaced. Many shelters will take you in with kids and even pets. Find a safe haven and get out as soon as you can gather the kids and pets and preferably when the guy’s not around.

Tips & Warnings

• Abusive spouses will usually never change. Don’t believe his pleas to win you back where he promises to change his ways.

• File police reports so he has a record of abuse building up. Get a restraining order if you fear he may come after you. Talk to your local police precinct to find out how.

• If he hits you even once, chances are he will one day hit you again.

• Don’t look back and don’t go back. Look forward and move ahead. No matter how difficult your circumstances may become going forward, they will not be as bad as an abusive relationship with the threat of getting injured or even killed.