How to Explain Divorce to Children

How to explain divorce to children?

Difficulty: Easy

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• Love, Understanding and above all patience!

Explaining to Children How to understand and deal with Divorce.

1. The first step in explaining divorce to children is remembering to be sure they know that the divorce is not because of them! Explain that Mom and Dad are just not happy together and cannot live together anymore, but that doesn't change Mom or Dad's love for them no matter what.

2. Next explain what the problems are, as far as if you have just fell out of love or cannot get along. However, this can be very tricky. Never bring the other man, or other woman into the discussion or argument whatever the case may be. All this will do is confuse the issues at hand and take the focus off the children which is where the focus is supposed to be.

3. Be sure the children know that they are your main concern and you know it makes things harder for them, but it is better for them especially as well as everyone in the long run. Be sure they know your main concern at all times is they get what they need from both parents!

4. Asking for their input, suggestions and feelings on visitation and custody will help them feel like they have at least some control over what is going on with their lives. Yes, you two are the ones getting divorced, but you all have been a team up until now in most cases and they have the right to their feelings and fears and worries just as you do.

5. Let the children ask questions and be honest with them whatever they may be. Children today are not as sheltered and naive as we used to be. They are a lot smarter than we give them credit for and if you lie to them, especially now they will not forget it and will not trust you.

Tips & Warnings

• Keeping an open line of communication is the most important thing right now! be sure the children know they can come to either , or both of you for any questions, help, worries!
• Do your very best to get along with the other parent and keep communications open for you and the children's sake.
• Try to still work as a team when is comes to the kids' everyday life. Tag Team if you can.
• Just as a suggestion, you may try weekly, or monthly family meetings where they can voice their opinions, worries, anger and fears and somewhere they can openly communicate with Mom and Dad as well as the rest of the family.
• Do your utmost to never put down the other parent in front of the children. This will cause anger, and resentment down the road.
• Do not work against each other whatever happens. Let the children know you back each other 100 percent as far as they are concerned don't try to buy, or bribe their affection, preference, attention, ect. this will come back to haunt you in the end.