How to Matchmake a Friend

If you have a single friend, it's natural to want to see her become part of a loving, long-term relationship. Perhaps you envision yourself matching her up with just the right person, which is a worthy goal. There are some things to consider, though, before you embark on such a personal enterprise.

Difficulty:

Moderate

Instructions

1. Should you decide that you want to actively get involved in trying to help a friend find the "right" person, make sure that she really wants your help first. You may have the very best of intentions in trying to assist your friend find true love. Unless she is agreeable to your efforts, however, you may be perceived as being interfering, which could put a damper on your relationship. If you find out that your friend does indeed desire your assistance, then you can begin to work on setting things in motion.

2. Find out what kind of attributes your friend is looking for in a romantic prospect. She may have a preference for a specific physical type or want to meet somebody who shares her personal beliefs or hobbies. If you attempt to set her up with somebody who doesn't embody any of the qualities she is seeking, your matchmaking efforts are not likely to be successful. Never make an assumption about the kind of person you "think" would be best for your friend. Remember, that individual is supposed to meet her standards, not yours..

3. Do your homework regarding a potential "date mate" for your friend. Make certain you know about that individual's character, reputation and background, before setting up a meeting. Although someone may seem to be "perfect", don't forget that appearances can sometimes be deceiving. You don't want to end up being responsible for introducing your friend to somebody who could be hurtful or dangerous.

4. Try setting up the first meeting between your friend and the person you have in mind for her in an informal environment. You could, for example, invite them both to a cookout, where they will be among other people they know, and just "happen" to introduce them, casually. Try not to contribute any added pressure by hovering over them or trying to manipulate the circumstances. At that point, it's up to them what happens next.

5. If things don't work out, avoid giving the impression that you are insulted that your friend did not find your choice for her to be suitable. Even the nicest people don't always "mesh" well, if there's no chemistry between them.

6. Let some time pass before trying to set up your friend with another person. It can make her feel disappointed and frustrated if you keep trying to match her with one person behind the other, without the hoped-for results. Ask her if she's ready to give your matchmaking skills another chance before moving ahead with more plans.

7. Continue to encourage your friend. Remind her that it takes time to find a true soulmate and that, meanwhile, she should enjoy the positive aspects of single life.