How to Involve the Father to be in a Pregnancy

Pregnancy requires partnership.

The degree of involvement in a pregnancy can be a confusing issue for dads-to-be. However, as a couple, it is important to remember that pregnancy is happening to both of you. The following article discusses ways for a pregnant woman to get the expectant father involved with the pregnancy.

Difficulty:

Moderate

Instructions

Things You'll Need

• Pregnancy books
• Childbirth preparation class

1. Share your pregnancy with your partner.

   Be sure to share your pregnancy with your partner. When discussing the pregnancy, say things like, 'We are pregnant' as opposed to, 'I am pregnant.'

2. Involve your partner in the decision-making.

   Involve your partner in making decisions. These decisions can include choosing a child-birth class, choosing a hospital, and choosing a pediatrician for when the baby is born. Involving your partner in these types of decisions will make it more likely that he will become involved in other aspects of the pregnancy.

3. Attend childbirth classes together.

   Be sure to attend childbirth preparation classes with the father-to-be. Learning about your developing baby together will help your partner realize everything that you are going through. It will also help him to see how valuable and important his role is during the pregnancy and the birth of the baby.

4. Let your partner know how he can support you

   Make your partner feel needed. Many men feel left out of the experiences of an expectant mother. Let him know what support you need from him and be sure to express your appreciate for that support.

Tips & Warnings

• Try to help your husband or partner understand what you are going through and how you are feeling. Encourage him to read the pregnancy book that you are reading or read him relevant passages from the book.

• Try not to overwhelm a less-than-involved partner with all of the decisions that have to be made. Discuss one important decision at a time and don't discuss multiple decisions during the same conversation. Be sure to let you partner know that you value his opinion and feedback.

• When attending child birth preparation classes, communicating with other expectant fathers can be very helpful to your partner. However, try to be sure that these other fathers-to-be are positive role models. Do not associate with couple who insist upon regaling you and your partner with scary birth stories. This can overwhelm and frighten your partner and make him more distant.