How to Identify Someone Who is Suicidal
The myth that someone who is suicidal doesn't talk about killing themselves is not true. Many suicide victims told at least one person of their suicide intentions before ending their lives. If you know someone who is talking about ending his or her life, or if you think that person is considering doing so, even though he or she hasn't told you, there are things that you can and should do in order to find out the truth. Taking the time to talk to that person may save his or her life.
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Instructions
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Talk to the person honestly and openly. Come right out and ask, "Are you thinking about killing yourself," or "Have you thought about suicide?" Don't be afraid that bringing up the subject will provoke the person or "put the idea into his or her mind." Opening the lines of communication will allow the person to tell you how they are feeling, and it will let them know that you care. Some people are just venting when they say things like "I wish I were dead," or "I just want to kill myself." Ask, calmly, if they really mean that. If they say no, it's a good idea to let them know you want them to talk to you about it, if they ever do feel that way.
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Find out if the person has a plan. A person who says that she is considering suicide is at the greatest risk if she has already made a plan to end her life. Asking the person if he knows how he would kill himself may sound like a morbid question, but it's one that you should ask in order to identify how great the risk really is. If the person knows where, when and how she wants to end her life, she needs immediate help. A suicidal person will most often be willing to tell you that she has a plan, where someone is not truly suicidal will more than likely act surprised that you asked this question.
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Pay attention to the signs. While it may seem like a good thing if a previously sad and depressed person suddenly appears to be calm, and "happy," this can actually be a sign that he has made up his mind to end his life. A person who begins giving away cherished possessions and making dates to visit old friends, for example, may in fact be making efforts to "say goodbye." It is critical that a person who is behaving this way get immediate help.
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Ask the person to get help. If they have a plan, do your best to find flaws in it. Talk about all of the things that could wrong. Ask the person what would happen if the plan doesn't work. Would they be crippled, paralyzed, disfigured, in a coma? Reaffirm how much you care about the person. Persuade them to call someone or to go somewhere with you for help. Do not leave the person until they have gotten help.
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Make the call. Even if the other person refuses to get help, you have to face the truth, and act upon it. While it will be one of the most difficult things you will ever have to do, it may just save the life of someone you care about. Take action. Call the police, or phone your local mental health crisis line. Tell them that you believe the person is a danger to themselves. Insist that someone intervene, now, not later. Don't give up until you get help.
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Take heart. There is hope. With the proper help and treatment most people, who were once suicidal, go on to lead healthy and productive lives. Be supportive throughout the treatment process. Keep letting the person know that you care, and that you are glad they are getting help. Talk about the future, and help them start to look forward to things again. Make plans for what you will do together in a year, in 10 years or in 20.
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Tips & Warnings
For help call 1-800-SUICIDE or 1-800-273-TALK.
Take all threats of suicide seriously.
Don't try to handle the situation on your own.
Get help now. Don't wait.
