How to Write a Wedding Toast

You’re the best man or the maid-of-honor, the wedding is fast approaching and you know you’ll be expected to make a toast. You keep thinking you really ought to give the toast some thought, but you keep pushing that thought to the back of your mind. Anyway, maybe you’ll just wing it. One word of advice: Don’t. The small amount of time spent preparing a terrific toast will pay off big time by saving you the embarrassment you could bring upon yourself, not to mention the bride and groom--and perhaps three hundred people you’ll be hoping to never see again. And you may even get a few compliments.

Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

How to Write a Wedding Toast

1. Start by brainstorming. You can easily do this by jotting down answers to the following questions: (Note: you may have to ask the bride or groom for a short “interview,” in person or through a phone call or even an e-mail.) How did the couple meet? How long have they known each other? Was it “love at first sight?” Where did they go on their first date? As a couple, do they have a favorite restaurant or nightspot? How long have you (the toast maker) known the bride (or the groom—or both) Will the bride be taking the groom’s last name? What do they consider their most positive qualities as individuals and as a couple? What kinds of plans for the future has the couple discussed? Is the couple already planning for children? You won’t be using all this information, of course, but this line of questioning will give you lots of material to work from. Add other relevant questions.

2. Now you’re ready to write the first part of your toast. Take three or four of the answers to your brainstorming and put them together in a few sentences. For example, here’s a beginning that uses some of those answers.“When Jack and Anne first met at a Cubs game two years ago, he knew that was it. She wasn’t that sure. However, Jack’s persistent attentions . . . etc.”

3. Next, you’ll write the second part of your toast. Write down in plain language what you sincerely hope for the bride and groom. Did they tell you they want four kids? Do you know they hope to travel around the world? Are they looking forward to remodeling an older home? It’s never corny to simply say that you wish them health and happiness. Here’s an example,“May Jack’s ingenuity and Anne’s determination combine to make them the terrific real estate team they hope to be in the coming years—and may their wonderful sense of compassion turn them into the great parents they hope to be some day.”

4. End your toast by asking your guests to join you in the toast by saying something like, “So please raise your glasses in a toast to Anne and Jack”--or Mr. and Mrs. Jack Watson if the bride will be taking the groom’s last name.

Tips & Warnings

• Practice reading your toast aloud; ask someone to listen and make comments. Be absolutely certain you know the correct pronunciation of the bride and groom’s first and last names.
• Sincerity always trumps lame humor, so don’t try to be funny unless it comes to you naturally.
• Resist the temptation to just find canned quotes or toasts on the Internet. They rarely hit the mark and often come off as just what they are.