How to Parent a Child of a Different Race

More and more, families are being formed by individuals of different races. Whether it is through an interracial marriage, an adoption or other situation, families are often made up of children and parents who have different racial and ethnic backgrounds. Parenting a child of a different race can be challenging. However, it can also be very rewarding as you watch your children grow into responsible, confident adults.

Instructions

1. Realize that parenting a child of a different race does have its challenges. There are things that you will need to consider that same-race families don't even have on their radar.

2. Teach your child to value herself for who she is as an individual. Work with her to develop a self confidence and a healthy self esteem. Teach your child that people should be identified for who they are and the things they do, not by their skin color or where they came from.

3. Continue building that healthy sense of self, but also teach your child that not everyone will see him for what is inside. The world is full of racism and stereotypical thinking. Some of the people your child encounters will judge them based on appearance. Others will be offended that your family is made up of more than one race. Your child needs to know that this will happen and how to deal with it.

4. Teach your child appropriate responses when encountering racism or bigotry. Role play with common questions or comments and help your child determine what she will say in resopnse. Remind her that she is not defined by the words she may hear from others.

5. Actively work to expose your child to many different cultues, races, religions and traditions. Help him to develop an appreciation for diversity.

6. Remember that being in a trans-racial family gives your child a specific identity that she will not share with either parent. Your child may feel a need to experiment with "acting" like one race or the other, especially during adolescence. Approach this time period with tolerance and patience and continue to affirm to your child that she has worth because of who she is and not what group she identifies with in the end.

7. Seek out role models who can help your child navigate the waters of race, ethnicity and identity. A responsible adult who grew up in a similar family situation might be a great choice. Having someone besides parents to discuss these issues with can help your child as he decides who he is and the type of person he will become.

Tips & Warnings

• Spend time with other trans-racial families so that your child can see she is not the only one growing up in this type of family.

• Encourage your child to have friends of many different races and from different backgrounds so that they can learn to appreciate and accept differences.

• Always speak positively about race and do not make derogatory or stereotypical comments about people based on race. Your child is listening and will remember your words both when she looks at herself and when she looks at others.