How to Survive a Teen's First Date

Your teen's first date is the true test of your skills as a parent. You want your teenager to have fun and display good manners. Most of all you want your child to come home safe and on time. This doesn't have to be a traumatic event for all involved, it's up to you be supportive and remain calm.

Instructions

A Daughter's First Date

1. Meditate or undertake a vigorous workout a few hours prior to the arrival of the date. Listen to calming music while breathing deeply through the nose. Imagine the date going well and your daughter having a good time.

2. Have a chat with her about the ground rules for the date. Find out the name and age of the date, the plans for the evening, destination and activities, names of other participants and contact information of all involved.

3. Insist on final approval of all apparel, including the degree to which clothing is torn and the amount of skin that is visible. Have the last word on hair, make-up and jewelry.

4. Establish as a hard, fast rule that the date must come into the house. State with expectation that honking the horn is unacceptable. Review the rules about drugs or alcohol.

5. Greet the date with a firm handshake and intense eye contact. Assess his age. Look for crow's feet. Ask tactful questions like, "So, who did you vote for in the last election?"

6. Make her promise to phone for any reason, including "having a bad time" or "need a ride home." Ask to be notified of late arrival home but stress to the date that a late arrival is not acceptable.

A Son's First Date

1. Undertake the recommendations in Steps 1 to 3. Find out what the plans are for the evening. Make sure that sufficient funding is in place to cover all expenditures.

2. Review manners and basic courtesies, especially in regards to how these things impress the date and the date's parents. Talk about opening doors, allowing the date to enter first, allowing the date to order first and other common displays of courtesy.

3. Make a quick rundown of the "no drugs, no alcohol" discussion that's taken place so many times before. Offer a quick review of the consequences just as a friendly reminder.

4. Stress the importance of going to the door of the date's home to retrieve the date. Encourage eye contact with the date's parents as well as a firm handshake and light conversation.

5. Restate curfew. State emphatically that a call home is welcome under any circumstance and that parental assistance is always available.

Tips & Warnings

• Stay calm and don't let fearful thoughts overwhelm you. Take an anti-anxiety medication or have a cocktail 30 to 45 minutes before the start of the date.

• Make sure your teenager has extra money in case of emergency or they need car fare home.