How to Find Independence in Marriage

Your marriage may the most important relationship in your life, and it can drive you into a deeper contentment with yourself or leave you feeling like you're missing something. It's important to know who you are with or without your spouse. Your independence should be something you appreciate about each other.

Instructions

1. Take responsibility for your own happiness. Your spouse isn't responsible for your attitude, you are. When times of trouble come, choose to overcome those feelings of despair yourself, instead of waiting on your spouse to set you free. That is independence.

2. Rest in the knowledge of who you are, with or without your spouse. He will be the one who completes you, but be satisfied with who you are as a person. There is nobody else exactly like you.

3. Keep growing and developing personally. As you mature together, you will be in a more harmonious state, whether doing things together or independently. For example, read positive books and surround yourselves with inspirational materials.

4. Communicate intimately, and don't be afraid to trust her with your innermost feelings. That's how you deepen your relationship, so that you can feel safe and accepted for who you are. Nobody should know you as deeply as your wife.

5. Trust your husband completely, and don't cling to him. Allow him to become the man he was called to be, so you can pursue your own calling as well.

6. Build your faith together. Worshiping together as part of a religious community is a way to explore your own spiritual needs, even as you strengthen the values you share with your spouse.

7. Cultivate friendships of your own. It's important to share guy things with guys sometimes without the girls around. Don't be afraid to schedule some time for yourself away from your spouse from time to time.

Tips & Warnings

• Though independence in marriage is important, don't compete with each other. In marriage, you are on the same team, and you can make your relationship last a lifetime if you aren't jealous of one other.