How to Make Finances Fun in Marriage

One of the biggest reasons for marital disharmony is finances. Married people tend to disagree about how their joint finances should be managed, and that leads many to divorce. Financial disagreements do not have to escalate into outright animosity. Here are a few ways for married people to reduce the stress of money on their relationships and turn it into a topic that they enjoy to discuss.

Instructions

1. Be quick to recognize that any decision about money is a shared process. Each person contributes to the family’s well-being in his or her own way, whether it is by making a salary or providing services in the home. So each spouse should be able to voice an opinion about how money should be spent.

2. Understand that the control of a family’s money is not the real problem. Generally, it is a matter of security or control that leads to the greatest disagreement. For example, when money is tight, security can become the main issue, leading to disagreement. Then there is the matter of one spouse feeling that he or she should control all financial decisions. The other party will feel powerless and denigrate any financial decision that is made.

3. Open the line of communication. Husband and wife need to talk about finances frequently, not just when crises arise. It is useful to talk about the underlying problems that result in most of your financial difficulties, and together figure a way to make them occur less frequently. It is important that each spouse try to understand the other’s points-of-view and factor them in to any long-rate decision that is made.

4. Create rules to keep finances on track. Just as children feel more comfortable when rules are established, so will each spouse in matters concerning the family’s finances. This becomes more important for families whose finances are complicated by two incomes. For example, questions arise as to how much each person can spend on personal expenses each month, forgetting that those expenses are paid by the family rather than the individual. A common solution is for spouses to agree on a dollar amount that each may spend each month, and that any amount over that should be discussed.

5. Set goals for the family finances. When goals are established, each spouse feels more connected to the process. Goals can be short-term, like agreeing to set aside a certain amount for entertainment, each month. Mid-range goals include saving for a new car, home down payment or a family vacation. And then long-term goals might include saving for retirement or planning for the couple’s latter years after the children are gone.