How to Look Approachable Yet Mysterious on the First Day of School

It's the first day of a school, which means a chance for you to reinvent yourself into that person you've always wanted to be: cool, confident, mysterious and yet approachable.

Instructions

1. Stand off from the crowd. There's no need tot rush up and introduce yourself. Relax and let people approach you. You don't need to be curt or evasive when they do, just don't gush. Be friendly and helpful, but remain reserved. Keep them guessing.

2. Look confident. Nothing is more alluring and interesting than confidence. Keep your cool, stay laid back and act like you're content in pretty much any situation. Succeed, but don't try too hard. Be effortless.

3. Make a thoughtful yet cynical response in class. Avoid sarcasm and insults, just demonstrate a wry, ironic knowledge of the subject matter, preferably english literature or music. The key is to show sophistication with being a show off. Do this only in response to a teacher's question, otherwise it will look like you're trying too hard.

4. Defy genres. While you want to stand out from the crowd by virtue of your stylish looks, you don't want to pigeonhole yourself into any particular genre or clique. The easiest way to do this is to mix and match the various aspects of different styles in a way that ends up looking harmonious and unique.

5. Pick up a novel. Something dark and complex is best. No, that doesn't mean Anne Rice's "Interview with a Vampire." Think more along the lines of "Catcher in the Rye" or "Crime and Punishment." Better yet, go for some French existentialism, like Sartre's "Nausea" or Camus' "The Outsider." It doesn't matter if you don't understand what they're talking about, no one else will either.