How to Give a Back Massage

Whether we’re hunched over a desk all day or standing for hours on our feet, the back takes a beating, and it needs a break. Soaking in a hot tub can help, but the best way to relax and ease tension in the back is a back massage.

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

Instructions

1. Ask your partner to lie down on his back and close his eyes, with his legs stretched out straight but relaxed, arms lying loosely slightly away from his body, and eyes closed.

2. Kneel or stand at your partner’s side. Place one hand gently at the base of the neck, where it connects with the back. Place the other hand just above the buttocks, at the base of the spine. Hold your hands in this position for several moments; this is an energy balancing to prepare you and your partner for the massage.

3. Pour some massage oil into your hand, being careful not to drip any on your partner’s skin. Rub the oil together between your hands to warm it.

4. Start to give the back massage by placing both hands flat on the back just above the buttocks, and on either side of the spine. Your fingertips should be facing up toward the neck. Slide your hands gently but firmly up the back using sweeping circular motions so that your hands move out toward the sides of the body. When your hands are at the sides of the body, keep them flattened against the skin and bring them around–still in a circular motion–up onto the back. Continue using these sweeping circles as you move up the length of the back. When you reach the top of the back, repeat two or three more times.

5. Place both hands flat on the side of the rib cage opposite you. Your fingertips should be facing down toward the floor. Starting at the hip, use the same kind of sweeping circular motions to move up the length of the side of the rib cage. Alternate each hand: When one hand is making the circular motion, the other hand should be coming in right behind it to repeat the motion. Once you reach just under the armpits, repeat two or three more times.

6. Place both hands flat on the side of the rib cage again, starting at the hip. Again, your fingertips should be facing toward the floor. Instead of using circular motions to move up the length of the side of the rib cage, alternate your hands in an upward motion that reaches up and over the side of the back. While one hand is moving in this upward motion, the other hand is returning to its place on the side of the rib cage to do the same. When you reach just under the armpit area, repeat two or three more times.

7. Ask your partner to move her arms up, so that her elbows are bent and arms and hands are resting around the area of her head. Place both hands on the shoulder blade opposite you and gently, but firmly, knead around the area.

8. Continue the motion down the length of that side of the back after you have kneaded the shoulder blade area.

9. Move to your partner’s other side and repeat Steps 5 through 8.

10. Ask your partner to return his arms to his sides. Move to face your partner at his head area. Place both hands on the back at the base of the neck, with your thumbs on either side of the spine. Gently but firmly work your thumbs in small circular motions down the length of the back. When you reach the top of the buttocks area, repeat two or three more times.

11. Move to your partner’s side and repeat Step 4.

12. End the back massage by lightly caressing the back with your fingertips. Start at the base of the neck and feather your fingers down the length of the back to the top of the buttocks area. Repeat this motion several times.

Tips & Warnings

• • If you come across an area that feels tight or sore to your partner, place your thumb on the area, press firmly and hold for several seconds. Ask your partner to let you know if the pressure feels too hard. Follow it up by using your thumb to make small circular motions on the area.
• • You can make your own relaxing massage oil to give a back massage by combining a carrier oil–like grape-seed, sunflower or safflower–with a few drops of lavender essential oil.