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Step 1
Don't get married in Vegas to a friend just for fun and then immediately get a divorce. This was clearly the beginning of Brit's demise, so if you want to keep your dignity just don't do this and hopefully you won't wind up on the same path as she did.
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Step 2
Stop smoking, drinking Red Bull and only eating fast food. It can't be good for your heath to live on energy drinks, Taco Bell and cigarettes. Also, think about all the money you would spend on mints and gum to fix that breath.
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Step 3
Never date a back-up dancer while his current girlfriend is still preggers with his child. It sounds self-explanatory, but not to Spears. This is not a good idea, so just don't do it.
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Step 4
Do not have children with the aforementioned back-up dancer. K. Fed has spread his seed enough, so reproducing with him further shouldn't be your first move.
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Step 5
Wear panties. It's just a good idea for a grown woman with children to wear undergarments. No one wants to see your Cesarean scars.
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Step 6
Keep your hair on your head. Susan Powder can pull it off and so can Will Smith but a general rule of thumb for blonde pop stars is to not shave their heads bald.
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Step 7
Finally, realize that partying with socialites and driving with babies on your lap won't let you keep custody of your children.
