How to Help Your Grown Child Move Into an Apartment

Moving into their own place is an important milestone in a grown child's life, but it's not always easy for the parents. Some moms and dads find themselves scheduling the movers and packing the boxes faster than you can say "over-involvement." But with a little restraint, they can learn to be helpful without taking over.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

1. Volunteer to be a resource, then step back. Let your child know you'll help him think things through, but you're not going to come up with all the answers.
2. Resist the urge to offer constant advice and ask questions like, "Did you line up the moving truck?" This child is going to be on her own soon, so she needs to feel the consequences of her actions--even if it means delaying her moving day.
3. Help pack, but don't do it all. Packing is a great time to reminisce about his childhood, but make sure he's not wandering off to text message a friend while you're left holding the boxes.
4. Be sensible about what you can carry. Your 23 year old is probably more able than you to lift heavy or awkward items.
5. Stay flexible. One of the neighborhood teenagers your son lined up to help move may have a last-minute basketball game. Let your child handle the accommodations of the new schedule and merely sympathize with the new wrinkle in his plans.
6. Bring refreshments. While you're loading (light!) boxes into your car, grab some bottled water and granola bars to satisfy your instinct to care for your adult child.

Tips & Warnings

• After the move, offer to help organize the kitchen. It's one of the most daunting settling-in jobs but requires no heavy lifting.
• After she's settled, don't ever just show up. This is your child's home now and you should wait to be invited.