How to Be a More Patient Parent

Kids don’t clean up on demand, dress quickly, or pick up their toys instantly. They need reminders to brush their teeth, feed the dog and do homework. Some days it’s a hassle to get the gang out the door in the morning and off to school on time. If you find that you’re tense and yelling more than you want to--perhaps these six tips will help you be more patient.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

1. Make Parenting Top Priority
   Parents are often impatient because the kids' needs interfere with their own schedules. We want to hurry the kids up so we have time to do all the things on our list. However, pushing aside our child’s needs in order to get things done is an approach that backfires when we end up feeling guilty for losing our temper. By making parenting a top priority, kids' needs get met first and everyone is less frustrated.
2. Give Undivided Attention
   Put aside some time each day to focus exclusively on each individual child. When a child knows that you’re interested and available to pay attention, they’re less demanding at other times.
3. Fix Your Own Stress
   If you’re having a difficult day your frustration level is higher, your tolerance lower and family members absorb the fallout. When you’re running on empty it’s time to rejuvenate yourself. Even a 20-minute pause to read a book, listen to music or take a walk will reduce your stress and positively impact the kids.
4. Don’t Take it Personally
   A child’s misbehavior is not a reflection on you, so don’t take their uncooperativeness personally. If your child has a meltdown at the toy store because you won’t buy a toy, don’t worry that others are thinking you’re a bad parent. They’ve probably been in the same situation and understand what you’re going through.
5. Stay Calm and Keep Cool
   To avoid saying something in a moment of exasperation that might be hurtful, it’s best to take a step back and think before instinctively barking orders. Counting to 10 or 100 gives room for a cool down so that you can make a reasonable request. Raising your voice adds even more tension to an already tense situation. Kids pay closer attention when you speak respectfully in a normal tone.
6. Add a Splash of Fun
   Whether it’s getting the kids out of bed in the morning, doing homework or getting ready for bed, look for imaginative ways to make it fun. By plugging into the creative way kids talk, think and look at the world, family members feel connected, less stressed and have more fun.